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bad days

Autist

I don't even know where to put this. It is very bad because I barely ever help anyone else here but you can't ask for help if you don't help. I don't even know what sort of help i need. All I know is I'm crashing. BSOD. These things keep happening that make it hard for me to not fall apart. I was going to write about them but I can't. But the latest is I did not get paid. Which meant I could not afford to get the bus to my part time job which I really enjoy. Which meant I am having another REALLY BAD DAY. There have been too many REALLY BAD DAYS recently. It just isn't worth living anymore.

Parents

  • i take 10mg escitalopram daily. I was on 20mg. my doctor decided to take me off them cold turkey because I took an overdose 2 weeks ago. A week later I had unbearable side effects, saw a doctor at the out of hours surgery and told him I had ssri discontinuation syndrome and needed to go back on my medication. He told me I was wrong even know I KNOW what ssri discontinuation feels like when Ive forgotten to take my medicaiton and one of the side effects is very distinctive. If he decided that wasn't it then he should have been doing lots of tests and admitting me to hospital to find the cause of the brain zaps in my head. But he didn't. He said because Id been off them a week that it coudlnt possibly be withdrawal even though I KNEW it was and refused to give me my medication and instead prescribed me diazepam.

    I have not had an assessment with the council. I have a support worker where I live but she is not here today there is nobody in the office today. This is very frustrating a day is a VERY LONG TIME for me and I am NOT good at waiting. I am still waiting for the letter from my diagnostic assessment. Even though it has now been 3 weeks since I was diagnosed.

    BSOD is blue screen of death which is what happens when computers are about to die. And that is what is happening inside me. I cant find any other way to describe it.

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  • i take 10mg escitalopram daily. I was on 20mg. my doctor decided to take me off them cold turkey because I took an overdose 2 weeks ago. A week later I had unbearable side effects, saw a doctor at the out of hours surgery and told him I had ssri discontinuation syndrome and needed to go back on my medication. He told me I was wrong even know I KNOW what ssri discontinuation feels like when Ive forgotten to take my medicaiton and one of the side effects is very distinctive. If he decided that wasn't it then he should have been doing lots of tests and admitting me to hospital to find the cause of the brain zaps in my head. But he didn't. He said because Id been off them a week that it coudlnt possibly be withdrawal even though I KNEW it was and refused to give me my medication and instead prescribed me diazepam.

    I have not had an assessment with the council. I have a support worker where I live but she is not here today there is nobody in the office today. This is very frustrating a day is a VERY LONG TIME for me and I am NOT good at waiting. I am still waiting for the letter from my diagnostic assessment. Even though it has now been 3 weeks since I was diagnosed.

    BSOD is blue screen of death which is what happens when computers are about to die. And that is what is happening inside me. I cant find any other way to describe it.

Children
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