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ASD and managing angry outburst (11year old)

J.Simpson

Evening, writing here at 10 pm as i am not at the end if the emotional line and i do not know what do to!! 

My son is 11 years old and has ASD, we only found out it was ASD in feb of this year, we was told years leading to this he had ADHD and that was the pathway he was put on to which we got the ASD diagnosis. 

I have had the local Family intervention teams in to help with his emontions, mainly anger. i have had behavioural support via his school, i have done parental courses also but every single thing ive learnt is not working the older he is getting. visual aids dont work anymore, timers, distraction, removing him or whatever is casuing the outburst away, nothing is helping. 

Basically i am really really searching for anything that can help us to manage the outburst!

any advice would be so helpful

thank you! 

Parents

  • Thank you everyone for your replies!! 

    i will take everything on board!! knew i come to right place! xx

  • in reply to J.Simpson

    Hi

    I was wondering how things have been & if anything's helped?  We're having a tough time over the school holidays - sibling fighting, screen wars the lot.

    Last night my son was having a meltdown, we managed to calm it down quickly but I feel I'm walking on egg shells & have no control whatsoever over discipline & his behaviour.  It's really worrying.

    Last night he said he wishes he wasn't like this & has said things like he wishes he wasn't here.  It breaks my heart, he has such low self-esteem which is then directed at us in anger.  I've said we need to get help from professionals as me & his dad don't seem to be able to help him but he doesn't want to talk to anyone else.

    He also said he is scared of me dying and that he wouldn't be able to cope if that happened.

    I feel so sad and helpless

  • in reply to Nikmum

    I am in same boat. Feeling completely deflated and constantly sad at being shouted at and abused. Nothing appears to work and I just don’t know how people cope. My dd is 12 yrs old. Sometimes can’t see any triggers, constantly told I’m an idiot when she can’t find something she has misplaced etc. I’m always in a state of high anxiety, just don’t know where to go now for help. 

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  • in reply to Nikmum

    I am in same boat. Feeling completely deflated and constantly sad at being shouted at and abused. Nothing appears to work and I just don’t know how people cope. My dd is 12 yrs old. Sometimes can’t see any triggers, constantly told I’m an idiot when she can’t find something she has misplaced etc. I’m always in a state of high anxiety, just don’t know where to go now for help. 

Children
  • in reply to NAS88223

    I've recently looked into PDA again (it's a profile of autism) a lot of it does resonate with my son, the past few days we've completely backed off with requests / demands / giving him more control & his mood lifted quickly.  He's still having some outbursts but not as frequently and settling down quicker.  Perhaps you can take a look on this on the PDA society website.  I feel like I'm constantly looking for answers or diagnosing him with something else, bit it's because I'm at a loss of how to help him or us as a family live together.  Sorry you're having such a tough time, I've no doubt hormones are also playing a part in it