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12 years old boy autism

NAS86116

Hi, my son is 12 years old. He is a very talented musician and does lots of work in various places of music professionally. He is studying in a secondary grammar school which is a mainstream school. But in different areas he needs support. He can't follow multiple instructions at a time. He can't understand people's emotions and doesn't know to show proper emotions at proper time. People think he is very mature and older because of his personality. If we don't teach him something in day to day life he can't do it. He can't jump and can't run properly till now. We had to teach him how to run. We had to teach him how to climb stairs. Before talking to someone we need to tell him what to say. But if he gets his favourite topic he will continue talking about it for hours. If he finds something interesting he goes for it and finds each and every single thing about it and it continues until I fight to stop it somehow and that takes ages to divert the interest etc. 

I am a LSA in a SEN school. Though since beginning I had doubt that he have some issues but as he is doing extremely good academically and in music, everyone said he is a genius. Now I think he has symptoms related to Asperger's syndrome. But as he is a very quiet well behaved and good student school is not helping me to get referral. GP is asking for school's assessment. 

Can anyone help me with this problem? As his problems are not quite seen normally by school or outside people, how can I get help to diagnose his problems?

Nabanita 

Parents

  • Good morning

    I also have a 12 year old son who is very intelligent. His reading age is 16+ and he is currently doing year 10 English work at school. He is also a quiet well behaved student but sadly struggles socially.

    When he started secondary school he became an easy target for the bullies. The school did not respond well to this and placed the blame on him, saying it was banter and normal childish behaviour towards him and it was his perception of what was going on that was the problem. 

    I do not work in education and placed my trust in them, I asked for help with this and they referred him to a friendship group at the school to learn how to be a friend.

    His mental health continued to decline, as well as his school work. I started to research his 'behaviour' and found very quickly that he fitted with ASD. He struggled to ride a bike and swim, can fall of his chair just sitting still, has never made friends but always seemed happy in his own world and various other things that we always just put down to it being just him. I spoke to autism charities, got support from our council and started to realise that the school was very wrong with their approach towards him and his needs. The bullying escalated and he was attacked so I pulled him out. 

    To cut a long story short before I pulled him out, I tried to get him on a list to be assessed. His school wouldn't add him to the list because they felt he showed no signs of autism. I went to the GP who said their hands were tied as it was the schools responsibility, but agreed that he could benefit from an assessment. We learnt that without the schools support we were going to struggle so we got him assessed privately. We still waited 2 months but he now has a diagnosis and is at a new school and although can not make friends he is able to be himself without the constant bullying. 

    Sorry I can not offer any other advice than this, but wish you all the best

    H

Reply

  • Good morning

    I also have a 12 year old son who is very intelligent. His reading age is 16+ and he is currently doing year 10 English work at school. He is also a quiet well behaved student but sadly struggles socially.

    When he started secondary school he became an easy target for the bullies. The school did not respond well to this and placed the blame on him, saying it was banter and normal childish behaviour towards him and it was his perception of what was going on that was the problem. 

    I do not work in education and placed my trust in them, I asked for help with this and they referred him to a friendship group at the school to learn how to be a friend.

    His mental health continued to decline, as well as his school work. I started to research his 'behaviour' and found very quickly that he fitted with ASD. He struggled to ride a bike and swim, can fall of his chair just sitting still, has never made friends but always seemed happy in his own world and various other things that we always just put down to it being just him. I spoke to autism charities, got support from our council and started to realise that the school was very wrong with their approach towards him and his needs. The bullying escalated and he was attacked so I pulled him out. 

    To cut a long story short before I pulled him out, I tried to get him on a list to be assessed. His school wouldn't add him to the list because they felt he showed no signs of autism. I went to the GP who said their hands were tied as it was the schools responsibility, but agreed that he could benefit from an assessment. We learnt that without the schools support we were going to struggle so we got him assessed privately. We still waited 2 months but he now has a diagnosis and is at a new school and although can not make friends he is able to be himself without the constant bullying. 

    Sorry I can not offer any other advice than this, but wish you all the best

    H

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