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How challenging is small talk for you?

Steven

I think people might describe me as being well-mannered. Though I try to be, it's not the flattering opinion it might seem but, instead, testament to my restricted behaviour in company - I have to follow conversational conventions, and politeness is such a convention. 

If someone asks "How are you?", then I can answer briefly or (far too) extensively; both might be viewed as autistic habits. None of this means I'm at ease in conversations, as cues and subtleties don't always make their presences felt. Most importantly, I have to remind myself to ask "And how are you?" in return; not because I don't care but because *making the conversational transition is a hard, slow process for me and doesn't spring to my mind immediately*. And all the while I'm conscious that mine is a limited life, one which limits fluent and interesting conversation. 

How difficult or easy do you find small talk and general conversation?

Parents

  • If it’s strangers or people I know or those I work with it’s OK. I can do it. However, if the conversation gets too long, I feel the strain and want to exit. I start thinking ‘I’m not interested, I’m trying to work, I don’t care, why don’t you eff off’ instead of actually listening to them, then I get really tongue tied. I want to burst inside, but of course I mask wonderfully with a smile and interested look in my face. My hands will be in my pockets picking my fingers to shreds out of sight.  I also struggle to talk sense if I am faced with someone I find attractive, or who finds me attractive. 

    For the most part, small talk is boring. Tell me something interesting about yourself instead please! That would keep me invested.

  • in reply to Catlover
    Catlover said:
     I also struggle to talk sense if I am faced with someone I find attractive,

    I have suffered with this.  I have to explain, but the risk of sounding like a huge douche bag is high!  Now that I'm older and more relaxed, I think most women (and occasionally men) grant me the latitude of honesty.

  • in reply to Peter

    Disambiguation.....Peter, you have unwittingly become embroiled in some "beta" testing of our new friendly overload Askimet.  Please be aware that my tirade of filth is merely testing the "hair trigger" of our new friendly overload Askimet.  It's always good to understand what language and phraseology is deemed permissible from the outset, I feel.  Thanks for your unwitting assistance in this regard Peter.

  • in reply to Peter

    Nope....there is quite a rig moral I go through to access this type of link so I don't often "click and hope"....it's not that I distrust the poster, but more a distrust of the permissions of the systems that operate to make everything so very easy for everyone.  Sorry to be a kill-joy. [How much do you want to bet that our spam-bot killers will now cage and torture this post for all eternity because of the words I have chosen to use here.  So there !  You Nincompoop son of a mother !! 

  • in reply to Deleted User

    ah shame, I've considered using that song next time I try to ask a girl for a date. :P unless she's a nurse in which case this might be more appropriate https://youtu.be/O8E4XoAeVdw

Reply Children
  • in reply to Peter

    Disambiguation.....Peter, you have unwittingly become embroiled in some "beta" testing of our new friendly overload Askimet.  Please be aware that my tirade of filth is merely testing the "hair trigger" of our new friendly overload Askimet.  It's always good to understand what language and phraseology is deemed permissible from the outset, I feel.  Thanks for your unwitting assistance in this regard Peter.

  • in reply to Peter

    Nope....there is quite a rig moral I go through to access this type of link so I don't often "click and hope"....it's not that I distrust the poster, but more a distrust of the permissions of the systems that operate to make everything so very easy for everyone.  Sorry to be a kill-joy. [How much do you want to bet that our spam-bot killers will now cage and torture this post for all eternity because of the words I have chosen to use here.  So there !  You Nincompoop son of a mother !!