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Pronouns...

I Sperg

Today I learned that one of my adult child's Friends Lorna now goes by the name Loz and identifies as male.  

Apparently if  am not to cause offence I now need to rejig a couple of decades of being vaguely aware of this person as a very feminine looking girl through to young woman and refer to Loz as HE in conversation from now on.

Loz's boyfriend apparently has had to make psychological adjustments that make my issues look trivial in comparison, but apparently he will do that for love.... 

Funny old world innit?

I will say this: The next time my o/h decides to crack wise at my expense, we'll see how she likes being effectively in a lesbian relationship for a while.. The cheapest way to go trans I've figured is to also change my faith at the same time. No biggie, we worship the same god, just in a diverse way.... Then al I need is a cheap and cheerful bhurka to chuck over the "cargo pants and tee", and the job is done! 

(I think I'll keep that one "in the hopper" for if my personal war of the sexes battlefield situation demands "special weapons" one day) We seem to be in a period of detente right now, so maybe I'll hold off ordering the bhurka...

Parents

  • Hi,

    So that we can keep the online community a safe and supportive space for all users, please ensure all posts and replies adhere to our rule 5 to ' be nice' and also to rule 7 which is no hate speech.

    You can read our rules in full here https://community.autism.org.uk/p/rules 

    Kind regards,

    Clare Mod

  • in reply to Clare Mod

    Thanks for this input. I found this thread very triggering being a trans woman myself so removed myself from it but I saw in my notifications that you had made this contribution which I really appreciate. 

    Just one additional point from me which I hope sits well with the group rules is that whilst many things and subjects have valid alternative points of view which can be respected if not agreed with, the right to our identity as trans people is not up for debate, it is an inalienable human right to be who we are without judgement, there is no alternative point of view 

    E

  • in reply to Alice-nice-Alice

    While I agree that it is an inalienable human right for anyone to be who they feel themselves to be. Though there is the obvious caveat that to be a murderer or cannibal, or any type of person who harms others, is not a right. I'm not sure that your assertion about immunity from judgement is a right, because that smacks of controlling other people's minds, or coercion in some way. A right to not be victimised, or discriminated against is more realistic, and respectful of the free will of others.

Reply
  • in reply to Alice-nice-Alice

    While I agree that it is an inalienable human right for anyone to be who they feel themselves to be. Though there is the obvious caveat that to be a murderer or cannibal, or any type of person who harms others, is not a right. I'm not sure that your assertion about immunity from judgement is a right, because that smacks of controlling other people's minds, or coercion in some way. A right to not be victimised, or discriminated against is more realistic, and respectful of the free will of others.

Children
  • in reply to Martin

    You write with clearmindedness and logic.  You write with balance and care.  Respect to you Martin.

  • in reply to Martin

    Which is exactly my point. 

  • in reply to Steven

    No, it was no error. You are creating a controversy out of thin air. I think very logically, and if I see an obvious flaw in any statement that claims universality, I feel that I do my interlocutors a disservice if I omit to mention it. Although the discussion is about transgender people, I did not mention them at all, so murderers and transgender people were not placed in any sort of conjunction within my post. Do transgender people, in being transgender, do active harm to other people? Certainly not! My point is that people who desire to do active harm to others have no 'right' to do so. I have a non-binary child (adult), whom I love dearly, so have no anti-trans agenda whatsoever. However, if any statement needs clarification, and exceptions pointed out, I will do so, whatever the subject.

  • in reply to Steven

    Again,I completely missed that subtext...

    It really does depend on your perspective, doesn't it?

  • in reply to Martin
    Martin said:
    Though there is the obvious caveat that to be a murderer or cannibal, or any type of person who harms others, is not a right

    Martin, yours is a good general point but you're unwittingly linking the behaviour of cannibals and murderers with that of trans people (in the context of this thread, at least). Maybe you'd like to rephrase, mate?

    -------

    I promised not to post again here, but felt I might alert someone to the kind of unintentional error in writing I so often make myself.