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Losing at a game.

NAS80182

How can I help my grandson he has Adhd, autism, SPD and may have Odd and if he loses at a game he has a major breakdown. He plays for a Sunday football team and when he loses he kicks off(not all the time) this can be very severe. It can include him swearing at his manager or other players, hitting the ground, screaming, shouting and just generally ignore adult interventions. We have tried everything we can to help him but nothing is working. He is an excellent footballer with real passion for the game. At the minute his manage will only let him train due to his really bad behaviour at a tournament where he lost to another team from his actual club. Please help we are out of ideas. 

Parents

  • Unfortunately I think this is a common part of being on the spectrum. I think it causes a build up of pressure and worry. 

    No one likes losing and the thought of losing. It causes a sort of sensory overload for us.

    I used to get this really severely. I play tennis a lot and this triggered it, still does but I've learnt to accept that I could lose and probably will. You can't win every game.

    I think you need to try and get him to accept and understand he can't and won't win every time. 

    If he loses it'll still be hard for him but at least being prepared should make it slightly easier.

  • in reply to 🎾Paige🎾

    My son finds it hard losing a game. I recall following him when he stormed off after a football game and gradually managed to talk to him and show empathy as he started to calm down. As he has got older he copes better than he used to most of the time. 

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