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Losing at a game.

NAS80182

How can I help my grandson he has Adhd, autism, SPD and may have Odd and if he loses at a game he has a major breakdown. He plays for a Sunday football team and when he loses he kicks off(not all the time) this can be very severe. It can include him swearing at his manager or other players, hitting the ground, screaming, shouting and just generally ignore adult interventions. We have tried everything we can to help him but nothing is working. He is an excellent footballer with real passion for the game. At the minute his manage will only let him train due to his really bad behaviour at a tournament where he lost to another team from his actual club. Please help we are out of ideas. 

Parents

  • Autistic people can be real perfectionists about things they really care about. It’s one of the reasons they often get so good at one special skill.

    he’s probably very conflicted because football is a team sport so it’s difficult for him to decide should he be angry with him self or his team. Right now it’s probably both.

    there is no short cut to learning perspective or maturity. He just has to confront failiour over and over till he comes to realise failure is the price you pay for success. I’d encourage him to treat failiour as a constructive learning experience. If he looses a game he must calmly ask him self why he lost so he can do better next time.

Reply

  • Autistic people can be real perfectionists about things they really care about. It’s one of the reasons they often get so good at one special skill.

    he’s probably very conflicted because football is a team sport so it’s difficult for him to decide should he be angry with him self or his team. Right now it’s probably both.

    there is no short cut to learning perspective or maturity. He just has to confront failiour over and over till he comes to realise failure is the price you pay for success. I’d encourage him to treat failiour as a constructive learning experience. If he looses a game he must calmly ask him self why he lost so he can do better next time.

Children
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