Urgent help needed please

Hi,

I hope someone can help me, I need some help quickly as I have been summonsed to court this coming Tuesday as my 12 year old ASD daughter has alleged abuse.

I will try and cut a very long story short...

My 12 year old daughter is diagnosed with ASD, she is quite high functioning and in mainstream school with a 23 hour a week statement of special educational needs.

In the last 3 months she has become more and more nasty and abusive towards me, frequently telling me to die.

School not supportive as she is "fine while she's here." her Dad and I are separated, and much of it goes over his head.

Three weeks ago she told me she hated me and was going to go and live at her Dads. She threatened to run away if I didn't let her and again told me to die.

Whether through tiredness or need for respite, I 'gave up' and let her go.

I then got a court summons and a court order served on me preventing me from seeing her.

She has alleged that I have assaulted her badly and have been physically and emotionally abusive. Her Dad is trying to get full residency and a court order to change her school.

I feel utterly sick. I have defended her, stood by her and explained to all the 'autism ignorant' people in her life over and over again.

Worst still, is that she has encountered children in care since she started high school in September, this never really entered her radar before. She seems to have made emotional sense of this by obsessively reading Jacqueline Wilson books and inventing stories and dramas about what a rubbish parent I am, to her school friends.

I am convinced that she has also been watching Coronation Street at her Dads house and is playing out the storyline with 'Fay.' I don't watch it myself, but a friend pointed out the similaritys.

I am struggling to afford legal help and have spent any money I had getting a solicitor to prepare and attend at court on Tuesday. I need to get this squashed as fast as possible.

Can I ask this community for help please? I have trawled the Internet for a simple description of this type of taking on characters to try and make emotional sense of something, but I'm having no luck and am running out of time.

I know this happens and I thought it was similar to echolalia, but I'm not finding anything specific enough. I need a concise, simple and preferably well researched document from a trusted source to give the solicitor tomorrow for her to present in court.

If anyone could help, I would be so grateful.

Thank you for reading this and any help anyone can give.

Kate x

Parents

longman over 12 years ago

Worth bearing in mind that some people in the spectrum cope well in school, but then let all the stress and pressure break out when they get home. Hence there is quite often a difference of experience between school observations and home life.
One of the potential outcomes is that after a "honeymoon" period the same reactions will start to emerge where she now lives. Or else behaviour at school may change.
The autistic spectrum either restricts the bandwidth for coping with stress, or increases the stressload through over-sensitivity. Hence there is a need for an outcome to that stress, which may not necessarily be spontaneous, and might happen hours later.
Also there is not the "get over it" option that neurotypicals have. Most people get over a distress and forget about it. People on the spectrum don't fully understand the causes of difficulties, and will continue to process incidents sometimes for weeks or months trying to understand what happened. This can lead to embedded grievances.
Anxiety tends towards spiralling anxiety or negative reinforcement. The process of trying to understand a difficult world, and the need to analyse, tends to fertilise the imagination to go over and over various permutations.
Consequently (any other psychosis such as in relation to a Coronation Street character notwithstanding) her perceptions may result from her overprocessing perceived grievances and fears.
If health workers concentrated on lifestyles rather than searching for "cures" there might be more help around for this kind of situation.
Cancel
Vote Up +1 Vote Down

Sign in to reply

Cancel

Reply

longman over 12 years ago

Worth bearing in mind that some people in the spectrum cope well in school, but then let all the stress and pressure break out when they get home. Hence there is quite often a difference of experience between school observations and home life.
One of the potential outcomes is that after a "honeymoon" period the same reactions will start to emerge where she now lives. Or else behaviour at school may change.
The autistic spectrum either restricts the bandwidth for coping with stress, or increases the stressload through over-sensitivity. Hence there is a need for an outcome to that stress, which may not necessarily be spontaneous, and might happen hours later.
Also there is not the "get over it" option that neurotypicals have. Most people get over a distress and forget about it. People on the spectrum don't fully understand the causes of difficulties, and will continue to process incidents sometimes for weeks or months trying to understand what happened. This can lead to embedded grievances.
Anxiety tends towards spiralling anxiety or negative reinforcement. The process of trying to understand a difficult world, and the need to analyse, tends to fertilise the imagination to go over and over various permutations.
Consequently (any other psychosis such as in relation to a Coronation Street character notwithstanding) her perceptions may result from her overprocessing perceived grievances and fears.
If health workers concentrated on lifestyles rather than searching for "cures" there might be more help around for this kind of situation.
Cancel
Vote Up +1 Vote Down

Sign in to reply

Cancel

Children

No Data