Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello my name is Shola and I would like for the age for being an adult to be lowered from age 18 to age 16, 15 or even 14 or 13 in this country and all other countries too because I am so angry with older people and people who are young treating younger people which includes children and teenagers like they are babies/little children when they are all not babies or little children anymore. People seriously need to stop treating children and teenagers like they are babies or little children right now as that is not acceptable and children and teenagers should be allowed to have more rights, responsibilities and freedoms like adults already have please I need to know what are the full list of things young people want to change and what are the list of changes that they want to see happen on this planet?
It's a slippery slope though if you lower the age you are saying kid's can have sex at 13 or 14 or 15 ? that is already the case in some countries which i am not for to be an adult means a lot of things. Self proficiency, job, Able to think for yourself must adults in early 20s don't even have that 13,14 is stupid besides the few geniuses that exist.
I wouldn’t say you have to be a genius to take considered decisions about where you want to live or work or vote for at 16 or even 14. The opposing side In the debate over the age of majority always seems to reduce the argument to sex.
there is no law that stops a manipulative and charming individual taking advantage of a naive consenting 16 year old sexually. The reason for setting the age there is obviously at that age a great many teenagers are sexually active in a way that is mostly not manipulative and the government is only willing to criminalise so much innocent activity.
as I’ve said with other areas of capacity and consent a simple binary yes / no isn’t always helpful. An all or nothing age limit isn’t either. You don’t suddenly gain impeccable wisdom in sexual maters on your 16th birthday.
refusel to move beyond a hard age limit to some sort of vulnerability or exploitation based test because it would be ‘too complicated’ is just intellectual and legislative lazyness.
so called Romeo / Juliet laws might be an improvement but I think largely we should be looking at the intent of the other party not their age. A 16 year old can still exploit other teenagers after all.
Teenagers these days are extremely sexualised - and the internet fosters really bad habits - young girls get thousands of compliments per day which is making them have an over-inflated opinion of themselves. This makes them all think they will marry a millionaire - so they will ignore 'lesser' males even though they will never meet their prize. A lonely life is in front of them.
Boys on the other hand get kicked so much on the internet that their self-worth is through the floor.
It leads young men to thinking the only way to get female attention is to pay - and so super-entitled girls will be stealing their money while they can..
Sorry if this sounds sexist but it's the modern reality.
I agree that everyone should have their choice of life - but the current system is going to see generations of lonely singles all missing out on what was in front of them due to unrealistic expectations and crazy entitlement.
Affairs are still approved of in some countries, like Eastern European countries... but the problem is, that it was only approved of for a man to have a mistress.
People change a lot when they grow older. Personally I think that real adulthood begins at 30, that's when people really begin to know themselves and what they want.
It's all fair and good if people want to marry young and have kids - but what if they don't want to? it's unfair to force somebody to do something that they don't want to do.
I've never been a fan of gender stereotypes, or people "having" to do something just because of their gender. If people want to adhere to traditional gender roles, that's fine - but equally, if they don't, that's also fine.
It's actually easier to get married young and grow up together - many more years of shared experiences- trying to match up later means you're much more set in your ways.
This is going to wound odd - but affairs used to be approved of - as long as the couple's gene pool wasn't polluted - no random offspring outside of the marriage.
I think you're looking at the whole dependency-thing backwards. By getting married, the man takes responsibility to earn the money to pay for his family - of maybe many kids - and her responsibility was to raise the kids and look after the house - which became easier and easier during the 20th century - but the man's responsibility never changed - just earn the money.
In the past, people were expected to get married at a very young age, and marriages are often arranged. No one deserves to be stuck in a loveless arranged marriage. Women didn't have any choices in life other than getting married young and having children, and be financially dependent on their husbands.
Sometimes, marriages just don't work out - no one should stay in an unhappy marriage, especially an abusive one.
Marriage can be risky for women too, their husband can decide to have an affair and leave them for a younger woman. Or get cold feet and run away from responsibility.
I have never wanted children, and my attitude towards marriage has always been "if it happens, great - if not, also great" as I'm quite happy being single. This doesn't make me selfish or "me me me", it's a personal choice. Plus, not everyone is suited to being a parent.
Of course I understand that if you're in a long-term relationship or marriage, there will be rough patches, times when it's boring, arguments, fights etc. and that both partners have to work at it to keep the love alive. But I do also think that it's better to wait for the right person than marry someone at 21 out of "duty", especially considering that at that age, most people don't know themselves yet. I know people who married later in life, and who have remained very much in love after many years.
The biggest problem is the whole me, me, me lifestyle.
Not long ago, marriage was all about duty - love is a Disney fantasy - it used to be a man of good standing married a woman of good breeding for the purpose of pushing the line forward - it was about duty and honour and having a bunch of children to carry on the family farm or business or name.
Today's successful marriages are all about duty - doing the best for each other to fulfil each other's dreams.
Unfortunately, marriage has become extremely risky for men - they are literally betting their life on the good will of a woman. If she decides that she's bored, he loses everything and becomes homeless. (over 80% of divorces are initiated by women).
There's going to be a generation of 'never marrieds' where the young girls all demand millionaires - and so will be disappointed until too late - and the boys will never match up so will sit on the shelf.
Would you want to be the bloke she eventually 'settled' for?
(not bitter or sexist - do some research - it's going to be a disaster in a few years - in some places, marriage is down to just 6%)
I'm not talking sex workers that's a completely different angle - I'm talking everyone on Instagram and facebook
You're looking at this from an adult point of view - not a 12 year old's. It is amazingly blatant in that girls get used to a massive amount of positive attention - even the 'average' ones get so much attention and compliments that they imagine themselves to be goddesses.
The boys just go around in circles - discarded trash. Their only way to get any attention is sending presents to the girls - amazon vouchers etc.
It's there in plain sight if you care to look - it's completely skewing the ability of people to form meaningful relationships in real life.
BTW - I'm not biased or bitter - I'm just explaining how things are- and most people on here are woefully unaware of what their children are doing.on the internet.
My 22 year old is very internet savvy - the has shown me all the things that kids are doing - it's not pretty.
Yeah, we do seem to have different definitions of man-child! When I say man-child, I mean someone deeply emotionally immature, who takes no responsibility for themselves. I have no issue with people being silly and bursting into song, since I do that sometimes.
I guess I am a "woman-child" in some people's eyes, by your definition. I'm self-sufficient, but I very much live in my own world. I do the adulting that needs to be done (rent, bills, food, self-care, life admin etc) but do what makes me happy the rest of the time. But yes, I agree, there are women who are incredibly immature also, I've met plenty of those.
I don't get the whole "playing hard to get" thing, it's just weird. I don't think anyone should relentlessly pursue or badger anyone. It annoys me when people objectify other people, or project their fantasies onto them - if I meet someone I find attractive, my first instinct is, well, to get to know them as a person/friend (I'm kinda demisexual so for me, sexual attraction happens only once a friendship is established - obviously I have to find them physically attractive to a degree, but for me it's 50% looks, 50% cerebral).
violetdr3amer said:I don't see why I should completely deplete myself dating a man-child, when I get absolutely nothing in return.
You and I seem to have a different definition of man child. When I say man child I'm talking about someone willing to burst in song and dance in public because they are in a good mood. Someone who has no interest in adulting beyond the bare minimum they need to survive.
violetdr3amer said:Women are expected to look after man-children and are deemed selfish and cruel if we don't, but as a man, would you put up with a "woman-child"?
I mean kinda yeah? By my definition not yours. Manic pixy girl is not a bad dating option. Some of the hottest girls I ever knew were capable of fantastically immature behaviour. Meanness isn't attractive but a lack of seriousness, appropriateness and propriety can be.
violetdr3amer said:gaslighting, deflecting blame
I mean arguing over who's in the wrong and doubting your other halfs motives just seems like normal relationship stuff to me. Couples argue. It only becomes intractable if you divorce the argument from reason and logic. When one side insists they are right because of the depth and sincerity of their feelings you're at an impasse. But if you really want to make a relationship work you'll take the time to rationally deconstruct a disagreement and find a compromise that works for both sides.
violetdr3amer said:I don't understand why men relentlessly pursue women until they wear them down, even if the woman is not interested.
Because if they don't chase they get out competed by the men who do chase. As a dating strategy not chasing women only works if the men agree to do it together. And since there are women who do pretend to have less interest than they actually do, because it gives them more bargaining power at the start of a relationship, or buys them more time to assess a potential partner, because of that there will always be a degree of doubt in a mans mind unless a woman is direct in her rejection of him.