Notions of identity

What do you feel is part of your identity other than your diagnosis? I'm asking this, because I feel I've been getting a bit bogged down by my recent diagnosis and coming on here. I've said before that I don't want to be defined by my diagnosis, so thought I would write about other parts of my identity. I feel I've always had a strong sense of identity of some particular aspects of my life, and I think these will always be with me. I feel like they are (or have been) non-neogitable elements of my life.

Growing up I was into "alternative" stuff which probably doesn't seem that alternative now but in the late ninetines /early noughties it kind of was. Music was a big part of my identity and still is. Probably up until my late twenties, if someone was into music which I saw a less quality than my tastes, then that gave me good enough reason not to like them. Thankfully that has changed now. (Also, I think the idea of "alternative" is very different now because of the internet and things are more homogeonised, but I suppose individuals could still be seen as conventional or unconventional...)

Other notions of identity I can relate to are being northern and from a working class family. This is so important to me.  Having had a university education, I feel I'm somewhat "caught" in the middle of working and middle class now.  I feel I'm a bit too common for some people, but too "posh" for others. This links in with my accent which is also another big part of my identity.

Another one, and I don't know if this is to do with AS, is I feel as I'm getting older, I've got a better B.S. detector. A lot of my friends are into eating out and trying new fangled places, stuff they've read on social media and hyped up nonsense. I don't have social media apart from this forum. I dont think it's that I'm getting more cynical, I just feel a lot of it is style over substance and I'm really not interested in eating a croissant crossed with a donut and drinking an expensive coffee from a cafe made out of plywood. I feel like the world is getting overly fancy just for the sake of it. Everything has to become a "thing" these days.

I'm sure there's other stuff I will think of once I've posted.

So what about you? What do you strongly identify with which is something you aren't willing to budge on?

I've edited the post to make it shorter

Parents
  • Does anyone else see the irony of asking autistic people about there sense of identity.  

  • No - we have valid opinions just like everyone else.    We know who we are - it's just that who we are doesn't always fit with the rest of the world.    What are you getting at?

Reply
  • No - we have valid opinions just like everyone else.    We know who we are - it's just that who we are doesn't always fit with the rest of the world.    What are you getting at?

Children
  • it is a masking is a coping mechanism.

    yes after diagnosis u do adjust your ego or create a new ego.   I did. I have several other personas  as well (masks ?) but I now know these are creations of my mind as is my identity/igo/self.  

    you have to be careful what you are doing  I am gaining reality ( no self ) in a slow controlled way.  Apparently removing your ego ( self , "me" , I ) can lead to a crisis/ a breakdown  if not done in a controlled way.

    I admit I am no expert at this and was just reading again today just how difficult it is to be without an ego and thus one with everyone ( enlightenment ? ) 

  • Isn't masking subconsciously hiding your true identity , Isn't part of identity based on experience ,

    I know the weeks after  i admitted i had autism my world turned upside down, the reasoning behind the things in my life all changed ,the foundations of my identity had changed .

    Thats what i found ironic in the question ,i was wondering if other people saw this to .  

  • because u have used the word "i" which immediately suggests u have an identity

  • You say" we" when you mean " i " ,  Isn't masking hiding / losing your identity. How can i have a true identity if i don't understand my own emotions .