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Think my partner is autistic

snowflake24

Hi All,

Just joined as hoping to get some advice and support. I have been with my boyfriend for well over a year now and as that time has passed, I have become more and more aware of certain behaviours of his that have 'autistic' traits.

The problem is, is that I know he's never been diagnosed with it (from some very subtle snooping) and I dont think he's aware these can make being in the relationship incredibly difficult at times.

Obviously I'm no expert, although I work with children with autism, I realise it can present itself in different ways and so what i think are 'traits' may not be, but I wondered if anybody could suggest some next steps etc. I ask now because we've reached a very signifcant point in our relationship and I feel that discussing and thinking about moving forward will be very difficult for him.

 

Any thoughts would be appreciated! :)

 

Parents

  • My wife similarly suggested that I look into autism after she noticed on-going traits in my personality and behavior.

    What she did for me was look at the autism.org.uk website to get more background on her suspicions and ask me whether I knew anything about autism - I did but not nearly as much as the website revealed to me.

    So after she had a look and asked me about my knowledge she sent me a few links, asked me what I thought and whether it had ever crossed my mind that it might be a condition I had.  I took it very well, did my own (far too extensive) research (including academic papers and nosology etc.) and am now deciding whether/how to go about pursuing a formal diagnosis.

    I can't comment on how your boyfriend will respond - but chances are that he will have had numerous experiences in the past that 'make more sense' after he learns more about autism.  Certainly the case for me - I either didn't realize I had problems and thought everyone else was at fault or I just accepted my life as the way of human experience.

Reply

  • My wife similarly suggested that I look into autism after she noticed on-going traits in my personality and behavior.

    What she did for me was look at the autism.org.uk website to get more background on her suspicions and ask me whether I knew anything about autism - I did but not nearly as much as the website revealed to me.

    So after she had a look and asked me about my knowledge she sent me a few links, asked me what I thought and whether it had ever crossed my mind that it might be a condition I had.  I took it very well, did my own (far too extensive) research (including academic papers and nosology etc.) and am now deciding whether/how to go about pursuing a formal diagnosis.

    I can't comment on how your boyfriend will respond - but chances are that he will have had numerous experiences in the past that 'make more sense' after he learns more about autism.  Certainly the case for me - I either didn't realize I had problems and thought everyone else was at fault or I just accepted my life as the way of human experience.

Children
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