Well yesterday was a nightmare, work have rearranged the staff room so my drawer has moved (only slightly but still) and there's new machines for me to use so that wasn't great. The new machines are upgrades to old equipment but I'm not dealing well with change just now and I wasn't given proper training as I was being showed how to work them by someone who had only used the machine once and briefly and then we got asked to take a medical student so I couldn't get my head into what's changed.
This morning I'm in the clinic with the new machines with someone who has never used them - just really? I'm struggling but keeping on top of it.
I'm finding it hard to settle, I have a lot going on in my head and can't organise my thoughts all that well. There's so much uncertainty in the atmosphere about redeployments and departments closing and I'm finding it hard to cope.
Today just got better, was supposed to see my manager today (she only works on this site once per week), she saw everyone else in the morning and then come afternoon I was in a sterile treatment room so she didn't see me after all.
I wouldn't mind but she's the one who wanted to see me today so I spent all of yesterday afternoon wondering what she wanted to talk about and going over everything I'd done for weeks in case I had made a mistake or someone complained only for her to not see me after all.
And then to put icing on the cake I went into the sterile room to set up the stuff for the procedure and that's had the furniture rearranged as well!
I honestly wonder if they're trying to mess with my head sometimes.
