Sigh... a long winded whinge....

Sorry, I didn't mean to suggest your son was having a lot of meltdowns. I used to have meltdowns virtually every day for a time when I was a bit older than your son. They are absolutely draining, and because of the surge of adrenalin they put me on edge of "flight or fight" all day long, eventually ending in a shutdown.

Does your son enjoy all of the activities he is doing? Again I stress I can only talk from my own experience, and every child is different. At your son's age I had no idea that I could stop anything happening, so I went along with everything that my parents did to me (I phrase it this way, because I was absolutely passive to everything they arranged for me to do).

I don't really know how to describe this, but the NT world was completely alien to me. I had no idea of how to explain any emotions or feelings at all, but also I didn't have any frame of reference to explain the world at all. Things made literally no sense, and although I had language I had no way of asking the right questions or explaining anything about my experience of the world. I can only describe it as being on an alien planet where everything is not like the world of inside my own head, and no-one can explain anything in the language that I understand.

I could only understand direct, simple, logical statements, and the response to my parents would be nothing or a very simple response. So for example if I was hurting someone by throwing a toy, if my Mother had said something like "You threw that toy. It hit me and hurt me. It is not OK to do that. Do you understand?", and this said in a very flat calm way, because any kind of raised voice or heightened emotion from my parents just sent me off into a pre-meltdown sequence where I can't hear and I just want to get away. My response would not be what my parents would expect, but would be very brief and flat, but also true. I have noticed that NTs sometimes don't get that people with Aspergers can give an emotionally flat statement, which is also completely true. I often say "I am not feeling very relaxed" in a flat way, this means I have tons of adrenalin surging round my system and I am about to have a meltdown if the situation is not changed.

I hope this helps, and of course I say again, every child and adult is different.

Sorry, I didn't mean to suggest your son was having a lot of meltdowns. I used to have meltdowns virtually every day for a time when I was a bit older than your son. They are absolutely draining, and because of the surge of adrenalin they put me on edge of "flight or fight" all day long, eventually ending in a shutdown.

Does your son enjoy all of the activities he is doing? Again I stress I can only talk from my own experience, and every child is different. At your son's age I had no idea that I could stop anything happening, so I went along with everything that my parents did to me (I phrase it this way, because I was absolutely passive to everything they arranged for me to do).

I don't really know how to describe this, but the NT world was completely alien to me. I had no idea of how to explain any emotions or feelings at all, but also I didn't have any frame of reference to explain the world at all. Things made literally no sense, and although I had language I had no way of asking the right questions or explaining anything about my experience of the world. I can only describe it as being on an alien planet where everything is not like the world of inside my own head, and no-one can explain anything in the language that I understand.

I could only understand direct, simple, logical statements, and the response to my parents would be nothing or a very simple response. So for example if I was hurting someone by throwing a toy, if my Mother had said something like "You threw that toy. It hit me and hurt me. It is not OK to do that. Do you understand?", and this said in a very flat calm way, because any kind of raised voice or heightened emotion from my parents just sent me off into a pre-meltdown sequence where I can't hear and I just want to get away. My response would not be what my parents would expect, but would be very brief and flat, but also true. I have noticed that NTs sometimes don't get that people with Aspergers can give an emotionally flat statement, which is also completely true. I often say "I am not feeling very relaxed" in a flat way, this means I have tons of adrenalin surging round my system and I am about to have a meltdown if the situation is not changed.

I hope this helps, and of course I say again, every child and adult is different.