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First xmas post-diagnosis

Breadpud
over 4 years ago

Well, I've been cancelling xmas for a few years now even before I thought I was Aspie.

I was Done with Christmas Cards a long time ago ( Wink) except to my family and have a good reason to be in my own home away from the madness as the parrots need feeding of course.

I gave up displaying any cards I got and don't decorate at all now. I really like this arrangement. I go into work in the holiday to keep a mental hand in. It's all about keeping a normality through two weeks of holiday celebrations for most people. (getting into the spirit of it for days on end is like a rabbit hole and difficult to get out of)

I feel blessed and thankful

It will be interesting post dx for this year, as I'm starting to let my mask drop and be the person I really am. I will be testing the waters. No more expectations SmirkSmiling imp 


  • over 4 years ago

    I, personally, LOVE sending Christmas Cards; as well as Christmas Decorations. (I put up my new tree, decorations and lights this morning)

    Each to their own, I guess. However, there are plenty of individuals with skeletons in their family closet. My brother no longer heads home for Christmas - he's Final Year at Magee University in Derry, studying Software Development - and I won't force him. He's more single-minded than me.

    My Star Sign is Cancer - so, I am a home bird by nature.

  • over 4 years ago

    Same here. I only realised about 3 years ago that my second wife and I had kind of drifted into a world where we don't send cards & presents to my mother's huge extended family anymore, and it's wonderful! My ex wife saw me not bothering and took upon herself the job of feeding cards and gifts to my mother's family, and got annoyed with me that she "had to" do it. It's a blessed release from the nagging and recriminations - I can just be myself.

    Now that we realise that I'm autistic and my wife probably is too (dx appointment should be early 2020), we realise even more the importance of listening to and respecting our inner selves & we're having a lovely time not sending stuff! She absolutely loves Christmas, but only for us i.e. keeps it in the house and anyone who visits, which is fine by me.

  • over 4 years ago

    The last line of my favourite Christmas record - Greg Lake - I believe in father Christmas.

    "The Christmas we get we deserve."

    I interpret that as if you get caught up in the craziness of trying to please everybody, you please no-one.   Instead, look after yourself and the people you want to share your Christmas with.

    Have a great day!  Smiley

  • over 4 years ago

    First Christmas Post diagnosis for me too... . (After assessment and confirmation yesterday that I meet the diagnostic criteria for autism). I am planning on sharing the diagnosis with family and close friends once I get the full report so that it will be much easier to put in place and not feel bad about the strategies I have been using to survive Christmas since being an adult (and able to some degree to make my own choices). Also hoping others may understand these better now too and that I am not intending to be rude.

    Hope you have a better experience of Christmas this year Breadpud and your true self is able to further emerge and flourish.