Outside

I'm not sure if ending your sentence at "...makes" was intentional or not, but it sums up perfectly how I feel about it most of the time! My brain can just freeze with the thought of it. Not that I particularly dislike outside per-se, it just has the awful habit of being full of people and noise. If I could just teleport to the middle of some nice woods or a meadow somewhere, I'd be outside all the time, but then I remember that in reality the next door neighbour (a lovely old chap) might say "hello" to me or something, which might break the dissociation that let's me half believe that it's not really there (honestly, this is not as tongue in cheek as it sounds; flippancy is one of my coping mechanisms!)

The one that gets me every time is when I've procrastinated for a good few hours (or days), have checked that I have my wallet and phone for the umpteenth time, get almost to opening the front door, and then suddenly think to myself; "How long is it since I spoke aloud to another human being? Am I going to be able to remember how to do it?".

I'm not sure if ending your sentence at "...makes" was intentional or not, but it sums up perfectly how I feel about it most of the time! My brain can just freeze with the thought of it. Not that I particularly dislike outside per-se, it just has the awful habit of being full of people and noise. If I could just teleport to the middle of some nice woods or a meadow somewhere, I'd be outside all the time, but then I remember that in reality the next door neighbour (a lovely old chap) might say "hello" to me or something, which might break the dissociation that let's me half believe that it's not really there (honestly, this is not as tongue in cheek as it sounds; flippancy is one of my coping mechanisms!)

The one that gets me every time is when I've procrastinated for a good few hours (or days), have checked that I have my wallet and phone for the umpteenth time, get almost to opening the front door, and then suddenly think to myself; "How long is it since I spoke aloud to another human being? Am I going to be able to remember how to do it?".