I could describe it as a mental paralysis. A feeling, that I can't do anything, feeling stuck. It's not just by itself, but a result of me being constantly interrupted while doing an activity. For example, my assessor gave me some interesting paper to read about autistic perception. I started reading, red one page. Then my daughter cried and called me to come and play with her because she was bored. It feels irritating but I went to play with her. She asked me to build a Santa's house with lego. I started. Then she got angry, that it's all boring and destroyed the house. Ok I left the room and calmed down. Then I started watching a video on YouTube- interview with Penrose about the universe. Again call and crying. I should build the house again, she was sorry for destroying it. I'm unfortunately too calm, too patient and struggle to recognise when and how I should react. I have a counsellor helping with it. I started again. And she got angry again. I suspect my daughter is ADHD, also heard such suspicion from her teacher, but I don't stick to it until I get full report from her assessment, that is ongoing.
Then she cried that I don't hug her, although she spent whole morning on my lap. I'm drained, exhausted, empty, irritated, want to do something to calm down but can't. And I'm anxious that if I start doing something, she will interrupt me again.
I'm not sure, if anyone has any such experience, or advice. In case if not, I'm just sharing. On the coming Thursday should be my last appointment of my assessment, so I'm also kind of paralysed by it.