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Heart Sink Words and Subjects

TheCatWoman

There are certain words and topics that make my heart sink as soon as someone mentions them, followd by the sinking heart, are anxiety and depression, unless I can distract myself pretty quickly.

One of those words is ACHIEVEMENT, never having had a sense of it and not understanding what it feels like, I know I'm missing out on something most people find important. I don't get the dopamine hit that others do, instead I feel anxiety that someone will come and take it away, or that I've gotten away with it or otherwise flown under the radar.

Along with achievement are GOALS AND AMIBITIONS, I don't have any and never had, I don't know how to have them. They were never part of the world I grew up in, a goal was something that happened in football and I don't think amibitions were allowed, othere than to get married and have children.

WEDDINGS Is another, really get my social phobia going, its like entering a different culture where everyone knows the rules, except me and everybody expects that I should know them.

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  • I get this, some words are hard to associate with yourself.

    'Goals and ambitions' are like the typical nightmare interview questions 'where do you see your self in 5/10 years time'.... makes my stomach curdle as I'm not ambitious and you normally have to fake something. I don't even know what they want you to say to that, what is even appropriate? 

    I'm okay with the wedding one, as I've not been to many, and then they were mostly small ones. (There was one I didn't go to due to anxiety and claimed car trouble).

    The words 'work party' though make me feel like that, a combination of not normally being invited as a contractor so you just have to listen to everyone else talking about it, or actually being invited when you weren't expecting it, which then brings panic as you don't know anyone that well.

  • in reply to Cinnabar_wing

    The best answer to 'where do you see yourself in 5-10 years time?' Is, 'Sitting in your chair.' That shuts them up a bit.

    I can't say I've ever enjoyed that sort of social either, like you say everybody knows everyone else, if they bring partners they all know each other too and I've always ended up sat there like gooseberry, until I'm sure everyones occupied and then I can slip away.

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  • in reply to Cinnabar_wing

    The best answer to 'where do you see yourself in 5-10 years time?' Is, 'Sitting in your chair.' That shuts them up a bit.

    I can't say I've ever enjoyed that sort of social either, like you say everybody knows everyone else, if they bring partners they all know each other too and I've always ended up sat there like gooseberry, until I'm sure everyones occupied and then I can slip away.

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