Has anyone here ever felt the need to end an intense and deep friendship that's more than a year old? I am considering cutting my "best friend" out my life. I know that sounds drastic and horrible, but I genuinely feel the only way I can be happy and survive is via doing this. Like me, they have autism, and the one time I tried to broach that their behaviour was causing me issues they had a massive non verbal shut down that after 20 minutes of begging on the phone they finally got out of.
1. In the past I've sent them a lot of gifts, nothing major, just small things they'd like. They got me gifts two Christmases ago, and that's it. I'd be fine with that, but they rarely seem thankful for the ones I've sent. The last thing I sent them was a really rare comic that I told them was one of my prized possessions. They said they were interested in reading it and thought they were sincere but nope, they lost it. The only other copy is like £70 online. Once again it's not about the money but the overall sentiment. Also I’ve hunted high and low for a PDF of said comic, with no results sadly.
2.They had a week off work and never told me. From what I've gathered all they did was get drunk at home with a FWB. During this week they promised they'd read that comic (it's like 20 pages long lol) with me and didn't.
3. In mid May they went radio silent with me. Entirely. I asked and asked what was going on? I asked if they were dating someone and had that person said we couldn't be friends anymore (we're the opposite biological sex). I got radio silence again. During this time my friend was my only connection (since rectified that, thank god) and I thought I lost my best friend forever. I was devastated. I didn't eat for 6 days. I could smell ketosis. I could feel my body ache. When we finally spoke, I tried to gently broach what was going on, and all they did was go non verbal and that ended with me basically apologising for not loving them enough while they knew I was starving and they did nothing to help.
I understand I sound like an *** here but there's so much more to this. I saw this person grow alongside me but the person they've became is...surreal .I've revealed vulnerable parts of me to them before and despite them been probably bi I've received homophobic language back from them. I feel they want a gay (I'm straight but that's another issue) best friend but also one they can basically abuse and use at will.
So....anyone else ever ended a relationship/friendship like this? I cannot stand by them any longer. I just can't. What happens if I end it? Is it possible to survive without a best friend and confidant? If you got this far, thanks for reading. I do appreciate it is very heavy and uncomfortable at times.
