feeling numb

Evening everyone, 

Does anyone else feel like this? 

I just feel numb. Pretty much all of the time, I find it hard to feel any sensation - this is emotional and physical and I find that more and more extreme attempts are needed to feel anything very much. For example, using a body scratcher/scrubber repeatedly, gave a sensation that I know in the past has felt painful. The other day, it was quite nice just to feel. 

I was praised at work recently. Previously this would have made me feel really pleased and again, i felt nothing and struggled to say acknowledge the recognition. I initially put this down to feeling my previous reaction was naivety and that I am a bit more seasoned and perhaps cynical. But that's not really me. 

I don't feel depressed or sad. I am coming to terms about my Feb/March diagnosis this year and so I wonder if there is something deep rooted going on psychologically. But I have little to be worried about except the world seems to have gone very monochrome. Not good and so this feeling is becoming something that is worrying me and consequently, I am finding concentration and focus on anything - work or life - really tough. 

I can understand why people can turn to substances and self harm - just wanting some sensation. I'm not there and don't want to end up there - but how do I navigate this? It feels that the rule book I had worked out for my life has been thrown into recycling and I haven't got the new version - leaving me, well, numb. It's really strange and I would appreciate any thoughts about what might be going on for me. 

Thanks. Andrew

Parents
  • Hey  , that sounds tough. 

    Getting diagnosed can be a shock to the system, like Bridalwhistle says, and it can take a while to sink in. But you sound like you could perhaps do with some help? I was listening to a wellbeing podcast and they had an episode on depression. They were saying it doesn't always manifest as doom and gloom, but can be a numbness too and not feeling any happiness*. I think it would be good to talk to a doctor about it, as if it's been going on for months, you might need help to get out of it. It would be great if you could get some talking therapy -as they will be able to help you pick through it -another thing that can make everything a bit distant is dissociation, so some one to help figure out what's effecting you would be good. 

    Take care of yourself, and just take it all one day at a time till you can feel more like yourself again, it can take time so don't rush yourself.

    *(The show was Complex with Kimberley Wilson, episode 'Are you depressed or just sad?'). 

Reply
  • Hey  , that sounds tough. 

    Getting diagnosed can be a shock to the system, like Bridalwhistle says, and it can take a while to sink in. But you sound like you could perhaps do with some help? I was listening to a wellbeing podcast and they had an episode on depression. They were saying it doesn't always manifest as doom and gloom, but can be a numbness too and not feeling any happiness*. I think it would be good to talk to a doctor about it, as if it's been going on for months, you might need help to get out of it. It would be great if you could get some talking therapy -as they will be able to help you pick through it -another thing that can make everything a bit distant is dissociation, so some one to help figure out what's effecting you would be good. 

    Take care of yourself, and just take it all one day at a time till you can feel more like yourself again, it can take time so don't rush yourself.

    *(The show was Complex with Kimberley Wilson, episode 'Are you depressed or just sad?'). 

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