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Anxiety about imminent holiday

Alice-nice-Alice

Hi everyone 

We are going on holiday next week and my anxiety about it is accelerating. I used to be such a good traveller but nowadays the preparation, worrying about how to take all my things I need to deal with sensory and health problems, the uncertainty about the hotel, parking, and just being away from our home feels like its going to crush me. I know my wife needs this holiday and I want to do this for her, and will, but it will be so very difficult. We have cancelled two european holidays in the last twelve months primarily due to my anxiety around travelling and as I said, being away from all my safety things and spaces, and our cats, and my library. 

Im not particularly asking for advice, Ive done all the cbt, grounding, breathing stuff time and over et and cet. I just always struggle with these trips now and given at the moment we are in the final phases of selling my house it will probably be a most stressful time. 

Thanks for reading this

Alice

Parents

  • I can relate to this, and my son experiences this a lot too (even more than me). It is a lot to cope with in all sorts of ways. I try and reassure myself and my son that in virtually every case we are fine once we’re there (in fact even as quickly as in the car on the journey there when we’ll often say to each other:  “I’m really glad we’ve done this now!)  - and we generally really enjoy the actual holiday. But the night before we leave we almost always feel like we wish weren’t going! I think that if we don’t push through the initial anxiety about these things then it just gets harder and harder and we will end up missing out on lots of really wonderful experiences. 

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  • I can relate to this, and my son experiences this a lot too (even more than me). It is a lot to cope with in all sorts of ways. I try and reassure myself and my son that in virtually every case we are fine once we’re there (in fact even as quickly as in the car on the journey there when we’ll often say to each other:  “I’m really glad we’ve done this now!)  - and we generally really enjoy the actual holiday. But the night before we leave we almost always feel like we wish weren’t going! I think that if we don’t push through the initial anxiety about these things then it just gets harder and harder and we will end up missing out on lots of really wonderful experiences. 

Children
  • in reply to Kate Kestrel

    I try to remember what it felt like while I was away last time and the good memories I have. You need new experiences else life becomes quite flat. But you are constantly torn between wanting newness but being pulled back to the familiar.

    You tend to regret the things you didn't do, not the things you did. So try to do things when you can.

    Nonetheless, it is hard to overcome the nausea, the lack of sleep, the checking, the planning, the worries, etc. but overplanning also diminishes things. Some of the best times are spontaneous.

    I am fortunate to have some money, so I rely on the idea that whatever happens I can just buy what I need. Thus helps a bit.

    But the day before is just hard. I don't think there is a solution. I kind of wish I could get excited and look forward to things properly.