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Sense of Identity

JMD

I’m 64 and have been telling people about my recent autism diagnosis. So many of them have responded with - “it’s just the same you, but with a label”. Or “I think we’re all on the spectrum”. Or “ But you’re really confident and obviously high functioning.”

I am beginning to realise that nobody knows me at all. It wasn’t a surprise that I’m autistic but it is still a seismic shift for me to really see and feel myself fully unmasked for the first time. I feel like I am hyper aware of my autistic traits, feelings and responses. I didn’t feel like I was functioning well before (despite looking like I was to others), but I feel even less functioning now.

I think I need to know that other people have experienced and felt what I am experiencing and feeling. Anyone?

Parents

  • I get this, when I have told people they almost immediately introduce themselves to me differently, based on how they shouid act in that situation. The ways people are taught to behave with neurodiverse people are so limited, this makes me really uncomfortable because it doesnt feel like genuine engagement. It's just that people don't always know how to be in those situations. It's a bit like when someone you know has experienced a death, the automatic response would to apologise, this is not the only response - its actually much better if people respond in their own way. Some people I told straight away dealt with it really well by being supportive. Probably because I gave them time to think about it.

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  • I get this, when I have told people they almost immediately introduce themselves to me differently, based on how they shouid act in that situation. The ways people are taught to behave with neurodiverse people are so limited, this makes me really uncomfortable because it doesnt feel like genuine engagement. It's just that people don't always know how to be in those situations. It's a bit like when someone you know has experienced a death, the automatic response would to apologise, this is not the only response - its actually much better if people respond in their own way. Some people I told straight away dealt with it really well by being supportive. Probably because I gave them time to think about it.

Children
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