• Replies 4 replies
  • Subscribers 5 subscribers
  • Views 104 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Bitter man

Doberkiin

I am 44, spent 25 years of my life as an alcoholic to make myself a NT servant. Long story short, got sober and psychoanalysed then was diagnosed with Autism. This obviously answered most questions in my life bla bla usual late diagnoses story. Been dry a while now and the only other feeling I feel then the normal "blank" is anger, real anger rage, it changes my whole body like nothing else does, it is quite intoxicating. I now have such a hated for the human civilisation for encouraging  me losing over half my life to alcohol and showing me the "life" I could of had if I was normal. Now literally everyone hates me (not an over exaggeration) now I am "myself" so I treat everyone as an enemy, the sight, sound and smell of a NT makes me rage. I am big, strong and as I do not feel anything I want to go on a NT purge and reshape this world.

I know it is bitterness but I am angry

Anyone else feel like this? 

Parents

  • You found out at 44, not 55 or 65.nYou still have time to do things, but not is you alienate everyone. Being angry and lonely is not better.

    You need to find a way to come to terms with the past and let it go or it will consume your future. Being on edge will make you snap at some point.

    You also need to accept some responsibility for your actions. You were the one picking up the bottle and drinking it. Yes the are are mitigating circumstances, but it was not done to you.

    I'd suggest exercise, such as running, rowing, cycling, swimming. For 40+ minutes and see if it calms you. It uses up the energy and burns cortisol and adrenaline. 

Reply

  • You found out at 44, not 55 or 65.nYou still have time to do things, but not is you alienate everyone. Being angry and lonely is not better.

    You need to find a way to come to terms with the past and let it go or it will consume your future. Being on edge will make you snap at some point.

    You also need to accept some responsibility for your actions. You were the one picking up the bottle and drinking it. Yes the are are mitigating circumstances, but it was not done to you.

    I'd suggest exercise, such as running, rowing, cycling, swimming. For 40+ minutes and see if it calms you. It uses up the energy and burns cortisol and adrenaline. 

Children
No Data