Navigating work anxiety while finding remote job to leave the UK? Trying to work out a way forward

I'm not currently under any services outside of the jobcentre, and I'd like to keep it that way if possible due to past trauma. I intend to ask the jobcentre in the New Year if they'll directly put me onto some work experience in an office. I feel that once my nervous system learns that the workplace is "safe" so to speak, I should be okay (and able to leave). Thank you for your encouragement and support :)

I'm afraid that most of the countries in the world are worse, often much worse, than the UK in regard to support for disabled people. The only exceptions are probably the Scandinavian countries. In any country, I doubt that you would automatically, or instantly, be eligible for all the support that is available to natives.

In my last two roles I was recruited 100% online – all interview stages were via online meetings. My first day in the office was just to collect a laptop and phone. This was post-pandemic, and I don’t work in IT.

I agree that full autonomy is relatively rare, but I think some types of collaboration are actually easier and more efficient when working remotely than in an office. It isn’t just about heads-down work, although that does make up a large part of my role.

I’m not an expert on content creation, but I’d expect a lot of content creators already work remotely.

Yes, many companies have mandated a return to office post-COVID, but many haven’t – and many won’t. Getting a job isn’t just about a company choosing you. Some roles may genuinely be difficult to do remotely, but many are well suited to it. You just need to find an employer that values outcomes over presenteeism.

Jalapeno said:

are you sure UK employers don't trust remote workers - given that 1 in 7 work remote and 20-30% of UK workforce work hybrid, which may only require 2-3 days a week in the office. 

I think there is a long period required before most employers will trust employees to work from home, but I do see more and more tools being deployed so the management can monitor you constantly and check if you are doing other things, whether using input monitoring or a camera and AI.

Some roles do lend themselves well to home working but requite a well developed skill set - things like programmer or DBA. These are not roles you will every get without experience however.

The OP says they have some experience in content creation, copywriting, social media management but my experience of working alongside these roles is that there is an aweful lot of oversight asked for by management to make sure the tone is right, the content styled in just the right way etc. Full autonomy for anything creative is a rarity.

I know the driver for working from home began with the Covid pandemic but I don't think companies liked to give up that oversight for long. Certainly my company got us back in the office as soon as physically possible and they were otherwise very progressive.

Jalapeno said:

I think my employer trusts me.

This is what takes time to build through proving yourself. I don't think many companies would entertain someone doing it straight from the start.

are you sure UK employers don't trust remote workers - given that 1 in 7 work remote and 20-30% of UK workforce work hybrid, which may only require 2-3 days a week in the office.  My contract is hybrid (but no minimum office attendance requirement  - so I go in perhaps 1 day a month) I think my employer trusts me.
I think perhaps your beliefs are a little out

Have you tried everything? It is much different in the part of the UK where I am from. It sounds like your area does not have the correct funding for disabled services, through the NHS (even though the NHS is awful anywhere in the UK you are).

if you are registered with mental health services, and you are currently receiving their services, then you need to go down the Individual Placement Support route (ask for IPS). They can help you find the work that is best suited for your needs, retain the job, write (or rewrite) a strong CV, and they can help you navigate through work problems that arise.

also, you might need to check out ‘WayThrough’, they are an independent scheme from the NHS, and the government, and they can signpost you to any support that is available in your area (if they don’t offer their services in your area). If you have not already done so, the last thing that you can try is going to your local job centre, and I say the ‘last thing’ because out of all of those options, that is the one which I least endorse. It can be much more difficult explaining to them about your needs, because typically they only offer employment support once you are in work already, but it you explain what is going on, then they will also signpost you and they can give as much support to you as you ask for. But you can’t go in soft, you have to be strong and you have to get your voice heard. Such is life, people only listen when you command it.

there is still hope for you to stay here in the UK, if you want it enough. I can’t help you with signposting to abroad services, because I have never lived abroad.

there are also options through the job centre, but you will have to fight tooth and nail to get yourself heard. Thus, I will recommend taking a trusted adult with you, or if you have no trusted adult, then get an advocate.

It will be a great defeat for our country if we lost such a young, intelligent woman with great potential and promise, such as yourself. You clearly have the correct attitude about your situation, but don’t give up yet. Your life has just begun, and you are going through a spell of torrential rain.

but remember, don’t wait for the storm to pass, learn to love dancing in the rain.

Things sound extremely difficult for you here right now and I am sorry that it has come to this. Countries you may like to consider are Sweden, Norway and New Zealand. I wasn’t aware that the Erasmus scheme of 2027 would include Master’s degrees, but you probably know more about how it will work than I do. I have also heard some positive reports of Denmark and Canada, though regarding autism, not everyone agrees, but they may be worth investigating. 

I’m sorry I can’t help regarding work experience, but perhaps others here will know more about that than I do.

Iain said:

What field do you work in or want to work in? This will shape a lot of the suggestions we can offer I think.

When looking for remote work you wil almost certainly need a reasonable experience in the field so if you don't have it then this will be very limiting. I would recommend getting some office based experience first so you will be trusted enough by management to work remotely.

IT is a field that I see shrinking as AI takes over more and more roles and this means a lot more competition from people who are laid off - one to avoid.

Ideally I want to work in content creation, copywriting, social media management and similar fields. I have experience for this online already with my portfolio, but I'm needing a stable job. Employers not wanting to trust remote-based workers with office work is their problem, not mine. I cannot work in an office full time otherwise i get overwhelmed, overstimulated and burnt out. If I do work in an office, it must be part of a hybrid role. 

Employers not trusting people to work remotely is their problem, not mine. I know remote work is more competitive, but finding something is still doable. However, I fear due to the rise of AI and offshoring, I'll be forced to learn to cope working minimum wage jobs in hellish environments. so i'd be open to finding support in a workplace where i can learn the ropes and make mistakes without fearing i'l get kicked out. that's my biggest fear with employment.

Do I force myself to learn to cope in jobs I can easily find? Or do I find jobs I know i can thrive in, despite being out fo work longer?

Iain said:

Have you checked if such financial assistance is still offered post Brexit? I thought most of these had been shut down.

You will also need a language skill to use in the country you travel to so this will limit your options.

Sorry I'm not criticising here, just running through some thoughts that are relevant to your situation in case they can help.

This is very fair. Even with the UK outside of Erasmus, options did exist that UK citizens could apply for. I did research on this in the past, the reason I delayed a master's is to hope the UK rejoins and UK citizens will become eligible for more support, as the Erasmus masters loan.

Ironically, Brexit led to more EU universities offering courses taught entirely in English. So there are more options open than people think. I was surprised upon researching it.

I need to get work experience this year so I can obtain a professional reference for my Masters application for 2027 entry.

Iain said:

I've loved and worked in quite a lot of countries and I'm afraid they are little better than the UK. Many are much worse in fact. I would spend a great deal of time researching potential destinations before committing to any ot them as you will most likely find the politics there catches up to the UK standards soon plus you are at the added disadvantage of being an immigrant and will become the focus of right wing hate.

In real terms there is far more support and protection for disabled people here than any other country I have worked in (Europe or South America).

I try to think of politics like the weather - we are subject to it but it is beyond out control so all we can do is decide how to endure it. There is no Nirvana in another country where we are accepted and accommodated in the ideal way so it is better to find smarter ways to live within the system here.

I already tried this. After almost 30 years of current oppression, abuse and negative judgement from most people, I mentally cannot cope with this country anymore. I did not mention this in the original post for privacy reasons, but I'm part of other marginalised groups being directly targeted by the UK government as part of their culture wars, which has been directly draining my mental health as I fear for my human rights and ability to live a decent life. This aspect is uniquely bad in the UK, only beaten by the US.

That's what I mean when I say I have no choice but to leave. Moving abroad will not fix my issues by itself, but it will help by giving me the mental safety I need to no longer be stuck in fight or flight mode (thus triggering my cPTSD).

Also claiming the UK is the best place to get support for things, including for disabled people (a form of British exceptionalism), alongside encouraging political apathy, is exactly the kind of attitude that's caused so many problems within. i know you mean well, but that mindset is rampant here, and I'm now mentally braving for you to tone police me as a result of saying this to you directly (British politics is another trigger for my complex ptsd for me).

CatsAreBeautiful said:

In terms of getting work experience, what should I do next?

What field do you work in or want to work in? This will shape a lot of the suggestions we can offer I think.

When looking for remote work you wil almost certainly need a reasonable experience in the field so if you don't have it then this will be very limiting. I would recommend getting some office based experience first so you will be trusted enough by management to work remotely.

IT is a field that I see shrinking as AI takes over more and more roles and this means a lot more competition from people who are laid off - one to avoid.

CatsAreBeautiful said:

I’ll hopefully be able to apply for financial support for a master’s degree in Europe

Have you checked if such financial assistance is still offered post Brexit? I thought most of these had been shut down.

You will also need a language skill to use in the country you travel to so this will limit your options.

Sorry I'm not criticising here, just running through some thoughts that are relevant to your situation in case they can help.

CatsAreBeautiful said:

Staying in the UK is not an option.

I've loved and worked in quite a lot of countries and I'm afraid they are little better than the UK. Many are much worse in fact. I would spend a great deal of time researching potential destinations before committing to any ot them as you will most likely find the politics there catches up to the UK standards soon plus you are at the added disadvantage of being an immigrant and will become the focus of right wing hate.

In real terms there is far more support and protection for disabled people here than any other country I have worked in (Europe or South America).

I try to think of politics like the weather - we are subject to it but it is beyond out control so all we can do is decide how to endure it. There is no Nirvana in another country where we are accepted and accommodated in the ideal way so it is better to find smarter ways to live within the system here.

House sitting is a great idea for autists - thanks for bringing this up. 

Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear but I think it is relevant to your situation.