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Ava

Hi I’m autistic but undiagnosed. I need someone who understands as I was bullied and grew up in a bad area and I have watched others to the point that I don’t show any autism at all because I was bullied and learned to copy but I didn’t know I was copying but I didn’t want bullied so I would repeat what others said and behave like others to avoid bullying and it’s become my behaviour but unfortunately it means that people don’t understand I’m autistic and I didn’t know I was either but I am. 
IM 100% autistic but there’s nothing I can do as I went for an assessment and didn’t get diagnosed. I get burnout and analysed everything to get things right but ambiguous communication and idioms and social cues and norms etc have caused significant damage as I’ve misunderstood people and they have misunderstood me. I catastrophise etc.

living nightmare 

anyone understand?

Parents

  • Hi and welcome to the community. 

    Yes, I completely understand. I grew up on a council estate, went to a not very good school and was bullied. I always observed others and also read novels a lot, so I think that's how I learned to act "normal" . But both the classroom and work environments were extremely demanding and challenging for me, and I was never able to reach my full potential. I am retired now and much more content staying at home most of the time.

    I'm sorry that you went for an assessment and didn't get diagnosed. The GP I had when I realised I was probably autistic asked me to do some tests and send him the results, and after seeing those he agreed with me, but was of the opinion that there wouldn't be much point in a formal diagnosis as I wouldn't get any support. After reading experiences of other people on this forum, some who have been diagnosed but still don't get any support and others who have been told at the assessment they are not autistic, I have stayed "self discovered" as we often refer to it here. Please be reassured that you are still welcome to be a member of this community without a professional diagnosis.

  • in reply to Lotus

    Thank you . Your reply means a lot and I hope you keeping well. Thank you.

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