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Liking yourself

Longbeakedechidnas

I've been diagnosed for a while but recently I have been struggling so much with sensory issues to the point where, most days, I feel completely debilitated by them, and I am finding it harder and harder to like myself when it feels like my brain is trying to betray me. I've previously struggled with suicidal thoughts and it scares me how close they feel to consuming me again when coping day to day is becoming so difficult. If anyone has any advice on how to even tolerate the more 'ugly' sides of autism, it would be greatly appreciated :)

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  • Hey there Longbeakedechidnas!

    So sadly suicidal ideation is very common amongst those of us with ASD. I’ve dealt with it as well (and rather recently, too). You’re definitely not alone when it comes to dealing with scary thoughts.

    If sensory issues are your primary source of pain, may I suggest trying to focus your attention on sensations that you enjoy? Like, I severely dislike smoke, sand, getting in and out of the shower, rough or tight clothing, etc. But there are so many sensations that I enjoy such as the smell of lilac, the sight of a lava lamp, the feeling of spinning something between my fingers, and so on. You might have to face the sensations that you have aversions to on a day to day basis, but you can try to fill your life with more of the sensations that bring you joy as well. If you need will to live beyond the painful aversions, then one thing that might help is to look for more and new sensations that you might enjoy.

    You may also think about bringing this up to your GP? It’s possible there might be treatments or medications that can help, but we can’t really recommend any here.

    I hope you can break the cycle of pain and find joy in the positive aspects of Autism. I’m wishing you the best.

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  • Hey there Longbeakedechidnas!

    So sadly suicidal ideation is very common amongst those of us with ASD. I’ve dealt with it as well (and rather recently, too). You’re definitely not alone when it comes to dealing with scary thoughts.

    If sensory issues are your primary source of pain, may I suggest trying to focus your attention on sensations that you enjoy? Like, I severely dislike smoke, sand, getting in and out of the shower, rough or tight clothing, etc. But there are so many sensations that I enjoy such as the smell of lilac, the sight of a lava lamp, the feeling of spinning something between my fingers, and so on. You might have to face the sensations that you have aversions to on a day to day basis, but you can try to fill your life with more of the sensations that bring you joy as well. If you need will to live beyond the painful aversions, then one thing that might help is to look for more and new sensations that you might enjoy.

    You may also think about bringing this up to your GP? It’s possible there might be treatments or medications that can help, but we can’t really recommend any here.

    I hope you can break the cycle of pain and find joy in the positive aspects of Autism. I’m wishing you the best.

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