Abusive relationships

I have always blamed myself for the way I have been treated. I feel like I let it happen and as soon as someone sees that you’re a push over they use that to their advantage. Maybe I thought that was what it was all about. 

I sometimes wonder if we subconciously pick friends and partners who we feel are strong enough to protect us in some way? Of course this back fires, because they either don't protect us or it them thats the problem.

I sometimes wonder if we subconciously pick friends and partners who we feel are strong enough to protect us in some way? Of course this back fires, because they either don't protect us or it them thats the problem.

I think there's definitely something in that theory.

Im usually calm in a crisis and very diplomatic, as a kid I was the opposite up till my 30s I would say.

However I still occasionally get that anxious about something that if I was the one who responded I'd blow things completely up. My wife is great at being diplomatic when my fuse has blown. Often find situations where she's led the way although I feel a bit ashamed to say it, as a bloke were meant to always be the one who does (or at least being brought up in the 70/80s we were taught that way)