Hi,
I was diagnosed at 43, a year after my mum died. I live with my sister, who has an autistic fiancé. I send her lots of information (often in meme form) about the parts of my condition that relate to me, but she still doesn't understand me.
Just now, I started to do something on my computer. She came in and asked me to look at something of hers. I said 'okay, as soon as I've done this' and she shouted at me for being rude. How was I rude? Just because I didn't immediately drop what I was doing to look at her thing? She said it was my tone. I reminded her of information I've previously shown her about autists' tone. She knows I'm not a self-sacrificing Care Bear, and I shouldn't have to pretend to be different from what I am. I purposely tried to say exactly what she says to me when I ask her to do something. I guess she wouldn't like talking to herself.
My mum used to always say that I was being rude when I don't believe I was. It's so hard to live with my sister. I can't move out of home, and she's not getting married any time soon. We have the same GP, so I don't know if I can talk to him about these things.