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Mask is slipping and I don't know what to do

Tallulah_x

I am feeling trapped at the minute.

Thought if I put down how I feel here, I may be able to process.

I know how I would advise others.

Encourage them to seek support.

Yet I remain stuck.

When I allow myself to feel, I am tearful.

I don't want to be around anyone, even myself.

I just want to go to bed, feel calm and safe.

I can't do this as I live with my dad.

He doesn't know but wouldn't understand how I am feeling.

My mask has allowed me to not feel and just get on with things.

My mask is slipping and cracks are starting to show.

I have no interest or motivation to leave the house.

I will go back to work next week, I can't be off sick.

I can't be at home as that will mean admitting I am not okay.

I can't miss work as my absence is being monitored.

I don't know if this is depression or overwhelm from suspected autism.

I am on antidepressants, have been for 15 years.

They don't seem to help much.

I don't want to do anything.

I just want to hide away.

This feeling never seems to go away.

Parents

  • Hi Tallulah (and welcome to the forum, I don’t think we’ve spoken before Slight smile).

    How you are currently feeling sounds a lot like burnout to me (and believe me, I would know face with spiral eyes).

    All I can advise is that you get as much rest and alone time as possible, and if you can, engage with your special interests. That’s the usual advice, although I tend to lose interest in everything.

    It just takes time I’m afraid.

Reply

  • Hi Tallulah (and welcome to the forum, I don’t think we’ve spoken before Slight smile).

    How you are currently feeling sounds a lot like burnout to me (and believe me, I would know face with spiral eyes).

    All I can advise is that you get as much rest and alone time as possible, and if you can, engage with your special interests. That’s the usual advice, although I tend to lose interest in everything.

    It just takes time I’m afraid.

Children