Obsession

Hi, does anyone have any advice how to stop obsessing? My therapist gave me a “homework” to research about autism. I started extensive research and can’t stop. I feel like I nearly puke but still can’t stop. I don’t want anymore, I want this topic out of my head. But I can’t stop it. Many painful memories from the past, many doubts, I can’t stop thinking, analysing, reading, watching, although there is a really helpful channel that helps me understand a lot about differences between autistic and non autistic people, I have strong feeling that it describes my experience. But I would like to stop and have some peace. I’m going crazy, and now it’s the Christmas- new year week, so my doctor is not there and I can’t wait to see him. I would appreciate any advice. My family suffers because of me being more absent than ever. I was always kind of absent, struggling to connect even to my loved ones, in other world, but with my aliens it was much more pleasant, I had a lot of fantasies about UAPs, about the possible first contact, alien abduction stories etc. but now I want to stop but can’t stop and going crazy, I’m worried I will end up in psych hospital. I would have to find a new interest but the problem is that they come unexpectedly and I never know when and what will come next to replace the previous one. I feel like my mind got stuck, I move around, do tasks automatically, often pace my kitchen and I’m totally not present in the here and now. I’m sorry maybe it’s kind of stupid what I wrote I’m kind of desperate. 

Parents
  • So sorry to hear this. I wonder why your therapist gave you this task - did they explain the reason? 

    The only thing I can think of is to try to engage with something else. Maybe read a novel or watch a movie with aliens in? When I was feeling lost after I retired, I made a decision to study free online courses to occupy my mind and I set times when I would study. If you think that might help, here is the website:

    https://www.open.edu/openlearn/

    Hope you feel better soon

  • He suspects me autistic, gave me a paper with it and asked me to research about it as my knowledge turned out to not be quite good. The more I research the more I get obsessed and also find myself there. I’m so tired of it I hope it will tire off itself. Now I’m like a ghost 

  • I’ve been over researching for the last 18 months or so to a point where I feel I need to stop as it’s become unhealthy. I started as I needed to learn as much as possible to better support my son. It has at times left me unable to contribute to normal family activities or conversation which then my partner gets upset with me. I guess when that much energy gets pumped into something we suffer in other areas. Could perhaps going back to something you used to enjoy distract you from it? 
    I remember you sharing your set plans and characters you used to create, could you perhaps do something similar and post it on here?

    I do hope you can find a break 

Reply
  • I’ve been over researching for the last 18 months or so to a point where I feel I need to stop as it’s become unhealthy. I started as I needed to learn as much as possible to better support my son. It has at times left me unable to contribute to normal family activities or conversation which then my partner gets upset with me. I guess when that much energy gets pumped into something we suffer in other areas. Could perhaps going back to something you used to enjoy distract you from it? 
    I remember you sharing your set plans and characters you used to create, could you perhaps do something similar and post it on here?

    I do hope you can find a break 

Children
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