Jealous Autistic Daughter

Hi,New to this community. I’ve always to deal with things myself, but really struggling to find any solution or advice for the situation I’m in.
My daughter is 11 and received an autism diagnosis earlier this year - this was after many years of trying to have her assessed. My wife and I have been together for 20 years, married for 10 and have a 16 year old boy (no autistic traits) and our 11 year old girl. 
For the last 18 months, she displays extreme reactions to any suggestion of my wife and I being happy together. She hates us touching each other (hand holding, even rubbing a shoulder), sitting or being next to each other - even walking down the street. We have never been over affectionate in front of her and public displays of affection have never been something we’ve done. 
Her reaction can and often does includes shouting, screaming, crying and she can sometimes be physically aggressive towards us. We’ve tried talking about it, tried different strategies to deal with it and have brought in professionals in school (school nurse/educational psychologist) but are no further forward. Is anyone or has anyone had any similar experiences that they’d be happy to talk about, or any ideas of anything we can do to try and move past this?
It’s having such a massive impact on our lives, our sons life and I’m honestly at a loss as to what to do - I do worry that this is just our lives now. Although we’re happy together, I’m worried the only solution is that if this carries on, at some point we’ll go our separate ways in the interests of our own individual sanity and happiness. 
Just to know that someone has been through something similar would help to show me that I’m not alone, because at the moment, it feels a pretty lonely place. 
Cheers 

Parents
  • Thanks very much for the replies. It is very much appreciated. I’ll have a look at those links you sent across Anna. Thanks for the suggestion you sent across as well Pixiefox. We’ll give that a go this week. I’m planning on sitting down with her this week and maybe writing down her thoughts and feelings, as she finds it difficult to verbally express how she’s feeling. Thanks as well for your message of support Emmalephant. Really appreciate you all taking the time to reply.
    We had a particularly bad day the other day when I posted, but your messages really helped me move past how I was feeling then. I guess we’ll just have to keep working on it. There’s no other option - and I really don't want it to be at the detriment to our marriage.  
    We’re going to have a look at some form of therapy for her and see how we get in with that as well. 
    Thanks again and happy new year to you all. Pray 

Reply
  • Thanks very much for the replies. It is very much appreciated. I’ll have a look at those links you sent across Anna. Thanks for the suggestion you sent across as well Pixiefox. We’ll give that a go this week. I’m planning on sitting down with her this week and maybe writing down her thoughts and feelings, as she finds it difficult to verbally express how she’s feeling. Thanks as well for your message of support Emmalephant. Really appreciate you all taking the time to reply.
    We had a particularly bad day the other day when I posted, but your messages really helped me move past how I was feeling then. I guess we’ll just have to keep working on it. There’s no other option - and I really don't want it to be at the detriment to our marriage.  
    We’re going to have a look at some form of therapy for her and see how we get in with that as well. 
    Thanks again and happy new year to you all. Pray 

Children
No Data