Published on 12, July, 2020
...Autism is a spectrum and everyone is different. What characterises a diagnosis of autism is if it has an impact on ones daily life. I am classed as "high functioning" but currently do not know what this means. Overload as a result from doing less than what someone who is not autistic can do. This means currently bare minimum of activity because intolerance and sensory input cannot be regulated. Working hours are reduced because of the struggle to cope with full time even though preference is to work more. The load is primarily from executive function difficulties which also include the social aspect and sensory. Fatigue on a daily basis which impacts everything. So, when people make throwaway comments like "we're all a bit autistic" or "I think my dog is a bit autistic" (yes, I was present), or labels like "high functioning", or someone gets imposter syndrome thinking they are "not autistic enough", just remember - the difficulties faced - on a daily basis - which many people do not face. I'm not saying no-one else has problems, but they are of a different kind.
What bugs me is nobody will tell me what I can get help with or if they can help me to get the help I may need. It seems like if you can jump through all the hoops required to get to speak to someone who might be able to help, then you obviously don't need help or you wouldn't of got that far. It seems I've got know exactly what I want and they can't tell me what services they offer, it all feels like going into a fine dining restaurant and asking for a bowl of cornflakes because you don't know that other food exists in your world only in the world of others.
I've been refered on now after two email, so here starts the merry-go-round. Last time I jumped through all the hoops to get help with digital stuff, after about a month and many many phone calls, I ended up with two women sat in my kitchen with a lap top who showed me two basic smart phones that I could buy in either tesco or argos and that was it!!! To say I was fed up was an understatement.
I'm lucky to live in an area with a charity that provides one. I've hot actually had it yet, but my 6 week course starts in September. I guess it is luck of the postcodes
I can relate to that!, I've just had problems with my new neighbor building decking and a summer house for the last 3 months drilling constantly, drove me mad, ruined my summer i couldn't sit out in the garden ,
I've contacted the support group in North Wales about getting a post diagnosis assessment, they don't seem to know what I'm talking about though, does anyone know how to get one?
Everything seems to have changed so much since I was diagnosed 12 years ago, either that or was particularly poorly served, which wouldn't surprise me. I was told I had coped for 50 years so I didn't need any help of support, I wasn't even told what if anything was available.
I'm still in the dark as to what does or doesn't count as 'stimming'. Noise wise-irregular repetitive noises stresses me out. Bang bang bang with a hammer(or the buzz buzz buzz of a drill)it stops for a minute or so then bang bang bang/buzz buzz buzz repeated repeat again and again. It would really stress me out when I lived in Essex.Luckily since moving to Wiltshire there's been none of it.
I would presume that i am, If I am not i am truely doomed. I plan to go for a doctors assessment. I can't give eye contact, i struggle to socialize, i used to stim with cigarette lighters now i've stopped smoking i stim with pound coins or remote controls. I stim with beer mats when im in a pub. I pace around the house for hours when I'm extremely stressed although i have not been bad enough to pace for a couple of years. I didn't even know what stimming was until i joined this forum. I don't like certain noises , like cats meowing or dogs barking there are alot of traits I seem to have that autistic people have.
It can be very hard to function well, despite having a very high IQ, if your executive functioning ability is in the crapper.
I find the current support level descriptions as far too imprecise. A situation made worse by a tendency for many (mental) health professionals to think good at x, good at y/bad at x, bad at y. It took many decades for it to be accepted that I genuinely struggled with some things, and I wasn't just a bolshy *** with a massive character defect. With that tendency came a lack of essential help and support.
I think we all have a personal low and high functioning level. For some there can be a huge gap between the two.
Moonshadow said:I have an IQ of 134 but I needed extra help at primary school when i was about 9 years old to help me to learn to read and write. I left school at 16 with no qualifications
Are you dyslexic? School age academic achievement has more to do with executive functioning, something those of us on the spectrum can struggle with, than IQ.
Spillage on isle 3 - cleaned up.
I've been reluctant to comment on this as I'm hardly an expert on Autism, I'm not sure how you would class high functioning, I don't think it is to do much with IQ. I have an IQ of 134 but I needed extra help at primary school when i was about 9 years old to help me to learn to read and write. I left school at 16 with no qualifications. I had to go back to college in my mid 20's to get an education yet i dropped out of university because i couldn't cope with my life at the time. I've never held a job down for longer than 2 years. I think i can pretty much pass as a normal person in the world. I look normal on the outside but underneath there is madness lurking which i try to hide to the best of my ability lol, I think people just perceive me as being a little quicky, shy and sometimes Aloof.
I get social anxiety , depression, I have no close friends, Life has been a battle to get through. I've been in a very stable relationship for the last 16 years which has helped me cope. My partner has propped my up through my bad times, I consider myself very lucky. I am sure i would of been homeless by now if I hadn't of met her. Before that all my past relationships never lasted longer than 2 years, they were all disasters. I relate to everyone so much on this site. I have spent 55 years trying to work out what was wrong with me and now I realize I'm Autistic. I struggling a lot at the moment, i spent all day in bed yesterday dwelling on the past I think if i had known what i know now when i was 20 I could of avoided a lot of bad situations I have found myself in. I know there is no cure for this but i think I would of suffered less if I had known.
Mine too
The good old days of loading a game on a tape recorder only to find it crash at the end of it’s cycle.
Martin
What a great way of explaining, those 3 examples are things that happen to me often. It takes all my power sometimes to not act on those feelings and again the cost is high.
AKOS series 2, it’s one of Keedies statements.
What's the book?
Some days getting out of bed and dressing myself is ‘high functioning’ or ‘mild autism’
My favourite author recently wrote this about how the world perceives us.
It's mild to you because we make it so, at great personal cost!
Tis an ascendant of Jeeves, Sir.
Beautifully expressed. I know what you speak of!!
When my autism is high functioning, I am not. Times when I cannot face making a necessary phone call, when I cannot get a packet of frozen peas back in the freezer, and break the drawer in a fit of rage, or when I'm on a crowded street and want to lash out at the people near me to get a little space. Wow! Then my autism is functioning at a very high level..