Published on 12, July, 2020
I went to the doctors today. Nothing serious just hand irritation. I have bad anxiety and a recent thing I do which I’ve also wondered might be a stim is scratching the top of my hands which unsurprisingly has led to soreness, irritation and taking layers of skin off. At the time it’s a comforting feeling, the aftermath is extremely uncomfortable. But despite this I can’t seem to stop. I only do it when I’m feeling anxious.
Waiting in the doctors was difficult. At one point I thought I would have a meltdown but somehow I remained controlled and focused on my breathing. My appointment was at 4:40 and I was still waiting at 5:15. I got really stressed, thinking they’d made a mistake and forgot I was coming. So I worked up the courage to ask the receptionist and she was really aggressive, told me I wasn’t being patient and no one else had complained. I tried explaining I wasn’t complaining, I just wanted to make sure there wasn’t a mistake. She said she’d call me when the doctor was ready for me.
That upset me. I find talking difficult and uncomfortable so most of the time I’m mute, another unfortunate part of my anxiety disorder. By the time I saw the doctor because the receptionist had shaken my confidence I could hardly speak, my jaw got really tight so I had to write everything down for the doctor, who luckily was a lot more understanding.
I wish people better understood autism. I explained my autism to the receptionist and she didn’t hide the fact she didn’t care. Result: I'm feeling drained and like I'm going to have a meltdown.
On a more positive note the doctor has arranged for me to see a counsellor at the surgery to help me with my anxiety as it’s become somewhat out of control in the last couple of years.
I thought I would say hello as well. My name’s Paige, I joined a few years ago but didn’t give it much of a try as my anxiety put me off.
Hello Paige, welcome back to the community
This is such a problem with GP surgeries, being left waiting for so long, with no indication or idea how long you are expected to wait for. Last time I went to GP, I checked in on the computer, and I was waiting for a whole hour before I plucked up courage to ask if I’m showing as checked in as I had been waiting so long. Receptionist confirmed I was checked in… whilst they weren’t rude, they wasn’t reassuring or apologetic. Anyway I eventually was seen, GP was more apologetic. I know the receptionist must deal with some difficult people, but it doesn’t take much to reassure people like us and to be kind.
I’m sorry you had a bad experience. You should definitely complain to them. Don’t worry that you’ll upset anyone by complaining. You’re just telling them how they made you feel and how it was wrong of them to be rude and patronising. You should be proud of yourself for still making your appointment, and seeing the GP even after the receptionist was rude. And that’s awesome you been referred for some counselling to help with your anxiety. I have found the organisations that my GP referred me to were really helpful and really understood and listened to my issues. I hope you have a positive experience and it’s helpful. Keep us updated on how it goes
I seen you mentioned you’re watching Buffy. I use to absolutely love watching that!!! And you’re mention of it has made me fancy watching it, so thanks for the indirect recommendation lol
AJ90UK said:This is such a problem with GP surgeries, being left waiting for so long, with no indication or idea how long you are expected to wait for. Last time I went to GP, I checked in on the computer, and I was waiting for a whole hour before I plucked up courage to ask if I’m showing as checked in as I had been waiting so long. Receptionist confirmed I was checked in… whilst they weren’t rude, they wasn’t reassuring or apologetic. Anyway I eventually was seen, GP was more apologetic. I know the receptionist must deal with some difficult people, but it doesn’t take much to reassure people like us and to be kind.
I'm sorry you had to ask, I can imagine how hard that was for you to do. I think this is one of the biggest problems at doctors surgeries. The staff don't keep you updated on what's happening and when you enquire what's happening they either don't put your mind at ease or as I found they make you feel you're in the wrong for asking. I know not knowing doesn't bother everyone but when you have autism being kept informed matters. Hopefully when my dad says about it tomorrow they might be better at communicating with patients in the future.
AJ90UK said:I have found the organisations that my GP referred me to were really helpful and really understood and listened to my issues. I hope you have a positive experience and it’s helpful. Keep us updated on how it goes
That's lovely to hear. I'm really glad you got the help you needed and you felt supported. This is what I'm hoping I'll get as well. Anxiety is horrible to live with and if this counsellor can even make it a little better than that's a win for me.
Yay I hope you enjoy watching Buffy again when you get to it! It's one of my fav shows. One I can go back to over and over again. Angel is the same. I love both.