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"Carefully Neutral" - How to Avoid Implications

Abbie

Looking for advice here. ND folks keep hearing words, sentences and meanings that I never said at all or ever intended. Telling them they're mistaken or they're jumping to conclusions, explaining what I actually mean, using my words more literally... None of these solutions work. If anything it just gets them more angry. Does anyone here know how to go about conversations in a more I suppose mechanical sort of way? One where they won't hear anything more than what I'm actually saying?

Parents

  • You can tie yourself up in circles over this until it breaks your brain. I think the real solution is just to get friends that don’t care and understand that sometimes they are wrong conclusions about what you said.

    developing thick skin is something people who deal with autistic people kind of have to do. if it seems like you’re putting an unfair mental and emotional burden on them I consider that the alternative of expecting autistic people to second-guess every word that comes out of their mouth before they say anything is a far more onerous burden.

    The former merely requires people to handle their irrationally hurt feelings. The latter tends to totally isolate someone because they cannot keep up with the pace of social conversation and end up sitting in the corner paranoid about what they’re going to say and being unable to interact with people.

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  • You can tie yourself up in circles over this until it breaks your brain. I think the real solution is just to get friends that don’t care and understand that sometimes they are wrong conclusions about what you said.

    developing thick skin is something people who deal with autistic people kind of have to do. if it seems like you’re putting an unfair mental and emotional burden on them I consider that the alternative of expecting autistic people to second-guess every word that comes out of their mouth before they say anything is a far more onerous burden.

    The former merely requires people to handle their irrationally hurt feelings. The latter tends to totally isolate someone because they cannot keep up with the pace of social conversation and end up sitting in the corner paranoid about what they’re going to say and being unable to interact with people.

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