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I feel useless

Ladybug5

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to go to Uni, or form relationships, or get a job, or live independently. I don’t even know if I enjoy or am capable of anything. I know people can be happy living simple lives and not “achieving” anything career wise etc but i have practically no function. I just want to be normal but I can’t do the bare minimum and have no desire to.

I had Uni and a future career planned and I just can’t do it.

Parents

  • Sorry to hear you feel that way, and I'm glad that you posted. A few thoughts generated by your post:

    - I'm assuming that because you are talking about going to Uni you are relatively young. I do think that is a particularly hard time in life, it certainly was in mine, I suspect looking back that was because I was autistic (and didn't know it). Going from school, where the people you spend time with are pretty much decided for you, you have little choice over lessons, a well planned day, and living at home, to the wider world is tough. But it gets better.

    - You haven't said why you feel that you can't do it - is it the academic side? The social side? The moving away from home (if that's what you are planning to do) side? if you try to break down the difficulties you think you would face, into manageable tasks / issues, that may help. So would thinking / researching what support might be available at Uni

    - Another thing that I found works as a technique, when things feel really daunting, and you think you can't do it (whatever it is), is to say to yourself, 'OK, maybe I can't do 'it'. But supposing for a moment that I could, what would be the first step I would take towards it?' That may help break things down.

     - I did find Uni really hard, not to say others would, or that you would, but it is not the be-all and end-all. If Uni is really not for you (and only you can decide if that is the case) that's not the end of the world. You can still achieve things - really important things - in your career without going to Uni.

  • in reply to MartinW
    MartinW said:
    You haven't said why you feel that you can't do it

    Not really the academic side- I definitely have issues with the social side and generally I just feel like my brain doesn’t work as I find it so hard to get through the day even when I do nothing. I don’t know how to explain really I just ‘can’t cope’ with daily living in most ways

    Iain said:
    tell us what you have problems with specifically

    I have struggled with depression for so long on top of being autistic that I am always exhausted and overwhelmed.

    thanks for the replies, sorry for the vent- I don’t expect any solutions just need to say it out loud

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  • in reply to MartinW
    MartinW said:
    You haven't said why you feel that you can't do it

    Not really the academic side- I definitely have issues with the social side and generally I just feel like my brain doesn’t work as I find it so hard to get through the day even when I do nothing. I don’t know how to explain really I just ‘can’t cope’ with daily living in most ways

    Iain said:
    tell us what you have problems with specifically

    I have struggled with depression for so long on top of being autistic that I am always exhausted and overwhelmed.

    thanks for the replies, sorry for the vent- I don’t expect any solutions just need to say it out loud

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