Published on 12, July, 2020
I have struggled with depression for at least 5 years and only more recently diagnosed as autistic. I’ve been on two different antidepressants- Sertraline and citalopram- and I’m not sure if I can even tell anymore if I feel any better.
I’ve been told that I’ve most likely been in a state of burnout for a long time so i now don’t know if autism is the root cause of all the depression I’ve felt ( I know it has definitely contributed) so would antidepressants just not work in this situation? Or am I just finding it harder to tell if I’m doing better because I can’t identify may own emotions as easily? I know that I don’t feel ‘happy’ or stable yet but I can tell if my mood has improved at all because I feel like my depression has caused so much brain fog.
has anyone had similar experience ?
I think antidepressants can help, sometimes, but it is trickier for us- many autistic people already struggle to identify our feelings and there's so much misdiagnosis going on that lots of us are inappropriately medicated for anxiety and/or depression that's really signs of an autistic person in distress.
I was on sertraline for a few years up until the end of last year and did find it helpful to some extent- I came off it due to improvements in my physical health and work environment but that happened to coincide with the realisation that I was autistic. I'm going to go back on them for a while to get me through the worst of the grief from a recent bereavement, and I suspect I'll be on and off them all my life, but I don't think I'm going to need them all the time. I do think they're probably going to be more effective for me from now on, now that I know which of my feelings/reactions/behaviours are autistic things not needing medication and which really are the anxiety.