I'm not.
I've never been a party person. I'm 69yrs old now, but even when i was younger, i think i felt odd not wanting to join in the festivities. But i think even more so now. Especially in the evenings when i'm sitting here alone. I've been going to bed earlier and earlier. I think about it, i wish things were different. I think if i had known what i know now, when i was younger, i'd have lived my life so differently
At age 52, raised an only child from a traditional Rural Irish Catholic (Vatican II) background, (which can bring its own problems), ex-gay man, later-in-life diagnosis of Autism, 30 years previous experience in supermarket retailing (now working in a hotel for just under a year), currently living in the U.K. 20 years, I’ve always disliked social events and parties, perhaps because parents were non-drinkers due to Catholic social teachings and thier own mental health issues and being encouraged earlier on to live alone, I turned back to the Catholic faith of my grandparents generation 15 years ago and it has been a real help, especially during Covid and lockdowns, as I’m also an Irish patriot - I taught myself to pray the Rosary in Latin and I attend the traditional Latin Mass where possible - I’ve come to realise that many of the struggles and trials I’ve had even before Covid and before my diagnosis has been greatly helped by my religious faith, as my interior prayer life has strengthened as has my faith that has carried me through - our Irish-owned hotel workplace here in the U.K. does have a lot of social events for staff and guests alike, but I’m very controlled in my use of alcohol - all my extended family live in Ireland just outside Dublin and I have one or two family members who had vocations to the Priesthood and Religious Life (Nuns) whom I visit the most, as these are the only two who truly understand my condition and the only ones that can be reasoned with and can have any sensible, reasonable conversations with, all the rest simply refuse to understand, telling me to “cop myself on” and “grow up” even after my diagnosis - some even believe and maintain that I should not be living/travelling alone and that the only way to manage my condition is via ultra strict “parental” style discipline as they maintain that I “do not understand that I’m wrong” on every issue and must not attempt to form, have nor express any opinion on anything as it is deemed (by them) on a “common sense” basis that “I don’t know anything about anything” and have “got the wrong end of the stick” - in (silent - for obvious reasons) the concept of “offering it up” and of learning to “pray for such people, in charity” has been a most useful tactic
Christmas is one of my most favourite times of the year. It is much more about gifts and Santa nowadays, but, it is also a time when my family always gets together from Christmas Eve, usually, to New Year. I get to see my children, my grandchildren and great-grandchildren, and that for me makes my Christmas wonderful. I don’t get to see everybody all together the rest of the year so Christmas is that one special time where I can. And for me, Christmas is all about family and thinking of those who have been lost and raising a glass to them at Christmas dinner, when we are all sat together. My grandchildren, especially my great-grandchildren are more excited for their presents and Father Christmas, still, their happiness is also what makes it such a special and lovely day.
I have never liked the idea of busy shops and streets. When I was little the world wasn’t as busy and shopping was easier then, though still felt busy, especially during the festive season. But these days it is all bustle and rush, people in the shops and streets, buying the overpriced food and gifts in time for the big day. I try to get all my shopping done before Christmas, I’ve made it a rule, never to go out in the final week before Christmas. It is much too busy and noisy for my liking. I prefer to stay in the quiet and the warm right before Christmas, the little ones like to watch their Christmas films with all the fancy effects in them nowadays and I love to talk about my own Christmas’s I enjoyed when I was their age. Though, I admit I did enjoy a gift from one of my great-granddaughter’s this year who insisted I opened it straight away this morning and presented me with a beautiful Marilyn Monroe figurine made of glass.
It is a mad time, especially these days. Everybody appears to be in a rush and feels the need to get everything they can. But, I myself, always buy only a small amount as that is all is required. When we came out of the Second War, many families, including my own were unable to spend much for the likes of Christmas, so we did not. I grew up taught to always buy only enough and not overspend resulting in wasted food and drink. Back then, one could not afford to waste anything.
It is interesting for me to see how different Christmas time is now. This year, as it has been for many years now, my family and I will be in quite a big house, with heating in each room and plenty decorations and a television for the little ones to watch their Christmas films on. Whereas, when I was a little girl there was no television, usually no tree, only one room had the luxury of a fire, so the rest of the house was cold and avoided unless one wanted peace or to sleep. How things change. Christmas, the world, has changed. My original family house is now gone. It was originally a doctor’s house, but today it is and the land around it, an estate of multiple, less attractive houses.
Christmas these days is different and changed, perhaps, not for the better.
But at home, with family, I love it.
For a good many years, I would really look forward to Christmas Day. It was the only opportunity I got to see relatives that I didn't mind spending time with, along with their adorable four-legged companions. The issue I had was more with Boxing Day, as it just seemed so boring in comparison, along with the knowledge that I would have to wait another 12 months before I would next get to see much-loved relatives (and their pets).
Worse than Boxing Day is New Year's Eve. I've always disliked it. Not because there's an expectation on me to participate in any NYE celebrations, but more because I have a tendency to reflect on things that have happened (or have not happened) during the past year, and an overriding feeling that the new year is unlikely to be an improvement.
'get out of Christmas card'
Omg I wish this existed lol 
I always feel strange on Christmas day and I can't explain what it is or why. The only time I haven't encountered this was the lockdown Christmas.
Bahhh Humbug! LOL. Somehow I am always happier come New Year. No need to even think about it for a whole 12 months.
I think what I object to is the fact that society doesn't really want to give you a 'get out of Christmas card' - everyone wants to force you to be jolly because Christmas must be so "special" and we are "party poopers" if we won't play along.
Duvet and book, please.
It will be ok. I will spend it mostly in my room listening to Christmas music and watching a few films - that's how I normally spend Christmas. My step sister has her family coming over so there will be that to deal with, I think karaoke too.
It will be ok. I'm looking forward to relaxing in my room :)
I don't think it's odd that you don't want to join in the festivities. I find it all very stressful and don't like joining in either.
Yes I am looking forward to Xmas. We have a small do on the day just our immediate household and then boxing day or the day after go visit friends and family that we actually like.
We hugely trimmed down our Xmas to just what we want and enjoy doing over the years because my other half (who isn't diagnosed with anything but definitely is not neurotypical) isn't a big social bunny either.
Xmas day was always the one day nothing bad happened to me so it is an immaculate island of unspoiled joyous memory in an ocean of trauma throughout my life. So with the exception of xmas shopping which I really don't care much for because of the last min rush and crush so I do it the day after Halloween or online instead... I actually really love xmas, I visually stimm myself into fuzzy giddy elation from the lights and decorations, and really throw myself into it.
i felt odd not wanting to join in the festivities
Not wanting to be overwhelmed, or risk making a social fax pas isn't the same as not wanting to be included, I know we autists usually aren't the most gregarious folk but I believe we still want acceptance and love just like everyone else. We're still human after all. Is that perhaps what you are feeling?
