My mental health 2022

Hello all,

I have been having poor mental health since January, and I have anxiety and I think I may have depression sometimes. The anxiety gives me headaches sometimes too. I sometimes think I have done something wrong and illegal too when I know I haven't. I also think about death and what happens after death every day.

I am also sensitive to light so I wear sunglasses, but my parents sometimes tells me to take them off. Wearing sunglasses makes me comfortable for some reason. I am also sensitive to noise, and I don't like fire alarms.

I like walking slowly because when I walk fast I get out of breath quickly. My mum also rushes me everywhere, like to Youth Club on Tuesdays, and I don't like rushing all the time. Mum says she is in a rush, and after she drops me off at Youth Club, she just sits in their carpark, so there is no need to rush. Mum also says when I walk slowly it's embarrassing her.

Names also get to me and some words, and it makes me upset too.

Today, my Mum rushed me from the train station to the car, and I accidently dropped my earphone in the road. A car came and broke my earphone that I just got last week. The next thing I knew, as Mum was speeding down the road walking, I then had to cross a road. I have problems crossing roads because they are busy and when something is coming I just wait for it to pass, as it makes it easier for everyone.

Whenever this gets too much for me, I get depressed and I think about suicide, which I know isn't good. I just can't take this any more.

Thanks in advance,