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Help for Anxiety/Confidence Issues in Adult Son

NAS77506

My son suffers with anxiety/lack of confidence, he has ASD. He has tried Matthews Hub for help but is trying to find a private female therapist that will be able to help him with his issues. One he tried just said straight no they cant help him and another he has messaged and they haven't gotten back to him, all the while this is making his anxieties worse, anyone know of any help out there he can goto. He has no friends and could do with something to help him socially as he tries to overcome these obstacles but gets very hot, sweaty and has to depart wherever he maybe at that time. He is the most loving, helpful, loyal to the core (especially to Tesco LOL), i just want him to blossom into the man he wants tp be and gain some confidence so he can see the beautiful soul I see every time I look at him. 

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  • Hi, You can find advice on finding the right therapy at the MIND website:  https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/talking-therapy-and-counselling/how-to-find-a-therapist/

    Or you can browse various private therapists directly here and type in your area : https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/counselling/england You can search for the type of therapy you think you need and go into the profile of each therapist to see what they offer and what their experience or qualifications are. 

    Some of the therapists will list what they specialise in which for some may include experience with Autism. 

    CBT and talking therapy does help many people but there are also some who respond better to or alongside more holistic methods such as exercise, Yoga, Martial Arts, Swimming and group activities such as Drama classes, Music, Gardening etc etc. Whilst talking therapy maybe a good place to start, I think it is important to establish some physical practises for long-term health and wellbeing as the research and evidence for physical activity as therapy is in no doubt. For anxiety issues or even trauma it is now understood that some of the above activities are more effective than all the talking therapies and prescribed drugs combined. Yoga, Tai Chi and the like could be particularly helpful for anxiety issues as these movement practises give the user a sense of feeling safe and secure in their own bodies. 

    I hope this helps.

  • in reply to Turtle

    Thank you so much. It was on the psychologytoday page that he found himself a counsellor which is the one that hasnt got back to him. Its a tough one trying to get him to do anything that he hasn't done before so now he has decided on private counselling I don't want to knock his confidence by suggesting something else if you see what I mean. He just needs to speak with someone, tell him what he wants and then the options be given to him but he refuses point blank to go through a doctor which personally I think would be the best place to start to be honest.

  • in reply to NAS77506

    You're welcome. I understand. I am only giving you food for thought as there are no quick fixes out there. I can see what you mean by wanting him to go through a doctor. This is all well and good and the help should be there in an ideal world but as many have experienced, especially with the pandemic, waiting times between 1-3 months or more are not unusual of a councillor becoming available. The number of sessions under the NHS may also be limited to a set number, say 8 for example. If this is not enough you may have to go private and change therapist which is an upset to many. With the NHS there may also be a choice or no choice of requesting a therapist with experience in Autism.

    Personally, with his reluctance to see a doctor, I would suggest the private route of trying to find someone with Autism experience or at the very least, one who your son clicks with. You can ask if the first consultation session is free to see if they will be suitable. 

    You could then gradually nudge him in the direction of some form of physical activity to manage any issues and of course, for health & wellbeing in the long-term. Also, as an Autistic person herself, Temple Grandin is a good source of advice for all things related to living with Autism. 

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  • in reply to NAS77506

    You're welcome. I understand. I am only giving you food for thought as there are no quick fixes out there. I can see what you mean by wanting him to go through a doctor. This is all well and good and the help should be there in an ideal world but as many have experienced, especially with the pandemic, waiting times between 1-3 months or more are not unusual of a councillor becoming available. The number of sessions under the NHS may also be limited to a set number, say 8 for example. If this is not enough you may have to go private and change therapist which is an upset to many. With the NHS there may also be a choice or no choice of requesting a therapist with experience in Autism.

    Personally, with his reluctance to see a doctor, I would suggest the private route of trying to find someone with Autism experience or at the very least, one who your son clicks with. You can ask if the first consultation session is free to see if they will be suitable. 

    You could then gradually nudge him in the direction of some form of physical activity to manage any issues and of course, for health & wellbeing in the long-term. Also, as an Autistic person herself, Temple Grandin is a good source of advice for all things related to living with Autism. 

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