ASD and Self Harm in Teenagers

Hello. I wonder if anyone is going through a similar situation. My teenage daughter has been self harming for around 6 months. We were obviously devastated. We finally got an ASD diagnosis in December but it hasn’t changed anything. She has a therapist who she likes but I can’t see how it’s helping. Her GP won’t medicate without CAHMS approval. CAHMS won’t approve until she has had therapy through them which she is on a long waiting list for. The support for her is slow but we are getting there.

What I am struggling with most is how to deal with her myself on a day to day basis. It feels to me like I have to make a choice to speak to her in an upbeat tone and do fun things together, to lift her mood, but that very much feels as if I am ignoring that fact that when I go to sleep she cuts herself. The other choice is to talk to her about it, but that is impossibly hard because of her ASD. She just can’t communicate about it. It’s like we are living in a parallel universe where she seems fine all day, but harms at night. I cannot make the two worlds join. There is beginning to be an atmosphere in the house which is awful. Has anyone been through a similar experience?

Parents
  • Update: thanks for your comments everyone. We have since bypassed CAMHS and gone directly to a Psychiatrist who has given the go ahead for the GP to medicate. She has been on anti depression meds for 2 weeks now and has also not harmed for 17 days which is a record. I know we aren’t the other side of it but I’ve felt the light at the end of the tunnel for the first time in many months. I’d like to say thank you to the people who replied who do self harm. And I’m sure, like me, people who love you want to hear everything you have to say. No matter how bad you think it may be. We are here to listen and love you and help you. 

Reply
  • Update: thanks for your comments everyone. We have since bypassed CAMHS and gone directly to a Psychiatrist who has given the go ahead for the GP to medicate. She has been on anti depression meds for 2 weeks now and has also not harmed for 17 days which is a record. I know we aren’t the other side of it but I’ve felt the light at the end of the tunnel for the first time in many months. I’d like to say thank you to the people who replied who do self harm. And I’m sure, like me, people who love you want to hear everything you have to say. No matter how bad you think it may be. We are here to listen and love you and help you. 

Children