ASD and Self Harm in Teenagers

Hello. I wonder if anyone is going through a similar situation. My teenage daughter has been self harming for around 6 months. We were obviously devastated. We finally got an ASD diagnosis in December but it hasn’t changed anything. She has a therapist who she likes but I can’t see how it’s helping. Her GP won’t medicate without CAHMS approval. CAHMS won’t approve until she has had therapy through them which she is on a long waiting list for. The support for her is slow but we are getting there.

What I am struggling with most is how to deal with her myself on a day to day basis. It feels to me like I have to make a choice to speak to her in an upbeat tone and do fun things together, to lift her mood, but that very much feels as if I am ignoring that fact that when I go to sleep she cuts herself. The other choice is to talk to her about it, but that is impossibly hard because of her ASD. She just can’t communicate about it. It’s like we are living in a parallel universe where she seems fine all day, but harms at night. I cannot make the two worlds join. There is beginning to be an atmosphere in the house which is awful. Has anyone been through a similar experience?

Parents
  • depends how bad the self harm is ------ basically self harm isnt so bad if the "cuts" arent that bad.   I sound mad but i did some self harm and grew out of it.   

    So how bad is the self harm ?

    it does show something is fundamentally wrong in her life --- something she doesnt understand. wants to change, and cant express.

    I would try to be cool for a while longer because she is talking to the therapist which is good and will help.  Stop trying too hard I know u love her.

    if she is 16 or over get her in here to talk about herself and her life.

    sorry u're going through this it can be very worrying. If she starts banging her head against a wall things are very different so look out for that.

Reply
  • depends how bad the self harm is ------ basically self harm isnt so bad if the "cuts" arent that bad.   I sound mad but i did some self harm and grew out of it.   

    So how bad is the self harm ?

    it does show something is fundamentally wrong in her life --- something she doesnt understand. wants to change, and cant express.

    I would try to be cool for a while longer because she is talking to the therapist which is good and will help.  Stop trying too hard I know u love her.

    if she is 16 or over get her in here to talk about herself and her life.

    sorry u're going through this it can be very worrying. If she starts banging her head against a wall things are very different so look out for that.

Children
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