Published on 12, July, 2020
I am a mum of two, 14 year old boy with asperger and a 12 year old boy with stress!
I am new to this ... expressing feeling and thoughts, I've never been on face book.
Most people, even though I'm lucky to very sympathetic friends, they don't really understand - although, they have children and every parent understands what it's like to worry.
(I nearly wrote 'even with perfect children' - but everyone has perfect children - it's just the world around and being able understand them, that's the difference isn't it?)
I know I need others who 'get' the problems without the added questions like: 'why doesn't he talk to the teachers at school?', 'why does he refuse to have his hair cut?', 'why doesn't he leave the house?' - HE JUST DOESN'T!! Worst of all, the looks like you're a soft parent who should just get their act together ... even my husband puts the blame of me for being too soft.
Do you get the feeling that you're the only one who can see a melt down approaching? - to be avoided at all costs - even if the end result is a domestic ... hard on the heart - but no one gets hit and nothing gets broken.
My youngest son always got it first - small, easy target - I've been his body guard all his life - I wasn't very good at the start, but I've learnt along the way. Unfortunately, I felt the only option for a long time was I had to take the blows for him ... not a nice place to be.
We're past the hitting out bit - nearly a year now (touch wood). Occasionallly things get broken - I see them as just that, 'things' - no one got hurt - is that wrong?
I'm not alone am I? R
Hi there, What you've described sounds a lot like what I 've been through or am still going through with my son who has Asperger's and he's 15. I also have Asperger's so I can think back to the way I was at their age and take a good guess what they must be feeling. Some of the issues I still struggle with, such as not wanting to leave the house. It's a frightening world for a lot of us Aspies, you know.