Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all, I just wanted to introduce myself to the community - it is a daunting new world for me (and no doubt many others!).
My child has just been accepted on the assessment pathway for a formal diagnosis, but its pretty clear what the conclusion will be. However, I wanted to post the question:
Does he behave in the way he does (often pushing my buttons) becuase he is likely to have Aspergers, or just becuase he is a 9 year old child? Does anyone else have this query mulling around in their heads? I try not to label him, but I can't always tell which it is.
I'm often told I am too lenient on him, discipline wise, becuase I believe he has a condition...I'm not so sure...more often this is said by my husband (who is not my child's father).
I would welcome any feedback on any of the above - my head it is a spin!
Hi, thank you so much for your comments. I was advised as we are in the early stages of ASC assessment not to look too much into Apergers as we do not officially know that is what we are dealing with - so I have tried not to.
It is hard though to find the best way of dealing with my son - whether to treat him as a 'naughty nine year old' or as a child with Aspergers. We understand that he is likely to be diagnosed with high functioning autism/aspergers condition. He is highly intelligent, but as you say he finds social situations and non verbal communications difficult to read.
My difficulty some times is that becuase he is highly intellegent he is able to manipulate people very easily - in the way a child would ask one parent for a toy and then go to the other parent when they did not get the response they wanted. He also has aggressive out bursts which is exacerbated by his natural father's telephone calls - as much as my son does want the calls, his behaviour towards me afterward is shocking to the point that he is aggressive with our pets, that he woudl normaly love and care for, in an attempt to upset me. I think there are so many issues going on here that it feels like a big ball of knotted string.
I must confess that I did have a mini-meltdown on Friday when I realise that a lot of people seems to refer to their children as 'aspergers/austistic children' and not just 'children'. I think it was the realistion the my son is different has hit me hard and I am frightened what the future will hold for him. (Though I do know a lot of people can live full and active lives - its more being labled that I think is where the difficulty I have is).
I will take what you say on board and continue to research on this site - thank you so much for welcoming me to the community with the time you have taken to respond.