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Just diagnosed at 62

Dave22

Although I always felt different, I assumed that I should be able to work through it, in 2008 due to issues at work my boss asked if I thought I could have Aspergers syndrome.

So read Tony Atwood's the complete guide to Asperger's Syndrome and my jaw dropped in recognition,- Not that I endorse Asperger, but my journey is was it is.

Back then robust diagnosis was not available in my area, so went on the waiting list 4years ago and got diagnosed, waiting for ADHD assessment now under right to choose.

I would love to be positive about having an ASC but the truth is I really hate it, which is silly, but it is also how I feel.

My condition has messed up my life and brought me great humiliation, and romantic/ sexual failure.

For me the things that I like about me that are likely due to my neurodiversity, are far outweighed by the negatives.

That's my truth and now that's out of the way, my special interests are daydreaming whilst twisting strimmer cable, The Stranglers rock band, Miki Berenyi, Cthulhu Mythos.

Researching various topics on youtube.

Anyone find that because they avoid talking too much about special interests, those interests wane a little?

The YouTube creator I'm autistic, now what? mentions a scientific ppaape that states that stimming is essential for an Autistic persons mental health, so I now Stim when safe to do so :-)

and feel better for it.

All the best

  • Welcome to a new reality.  Ive recently got my ADHD assessment which has only taken 7.5 years since I walked into the doctors at age 54 to request it.  Doctor had known me a long time and said he knew I had it back then.  Its taken so long to get assessed that they've changed the name from Asperger's to Autism and ADHD and something else new every month, and Im fully expecting it to change again before I get a clinical assessment, for  drug treatment for ADHD which Ive been waiting for, for over a year now since the ADHD assessment!
    Stimming can take many forms.  I know people who grip the skin between their thumb and forefinger, or wiggle their toes.  Personally I favour a rather imposing small notebook and pencil so i can appear to be making notes  and listening when in fact I'm designing the latest mechanical mechanism to 3d Print out.    I avoid fidget toys because I think theyt get labelled by many NT people as reinforcing their idiot prejudices, so I am developing a fidget stealth bracelet that does an amazing variety of movements but looks like a simple beaded thing.  Early days for you so be kind to yourself and watch out for the diagnosis backlash that in some, certainly in me a few years aqgo, makes you want to shout in everyones face when they question you now.

  • in reply to Oscar

    Hi Oscar

    Yes you're right, if the world was run just a little bit differently, things might have been better.

    Thank you

    Dave22

  • Hello Dave22, 

    I am in my 70's and only diagnosed this year. I can empathise with your inner conflict over your diagnosis and how this is related to your life experiences.

    I could say that ASD has dominated my life and caused so many problems both economic and personal. However, I don't.  Having received my assessment I spent several weeks thinking of the past and how autism had "caused" so many issues.  Then I realised 2 things.
    Firstly, that I was possibly using my ASD as a scapegoat. Many of these life problems were probably down to how others, mostly NT, had treated or even used me. 
    Secondly, I was also at risk of "throwing the baby out with the bath water" by regarding my ASD as just a negative thing. So, I started going through all the things I really enjoy which give me such a sense of peace and contentment. The many hobbies I have had and all the things I have made and treasure, my empathy with animals and love of gardening, my general willingness to try new things, the glimmers from the many small coloured objects I have collected over a lifetime, being able to sense minute details and differences in colours, sounds and smells, etc. etc.. 

    It is generally recognised that a diagnosis takes quite some time to assimilate. So fat, it has taken me about 6 months to re-think/re-frame who I am. The usual recommendation is to take just things slowly and be kind to yourself. 

    Best wishes,
    Oscar

  • Dear Dave22,

    Welcome to the forum - we are so pleased to have you here. We hope you find support and friendship here. Congratulations on your diagnosis.  Stimming can be very soothing and calming and I am glad you are feeling better for it. You sound like you have done some reading already but of you feel you would like to learn more please feel free to explore our advice and guidance pages. You can access this via the link at the top of the page or via the following link:

    Advice and Guidance 

    There you will find a variety of topics which you may find interesting. If there is anything specific then please do ask and we will try to support you. 

    With very best wishes, 

    Anna Mod