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Just diagnosed at 57

LaraS

Hi. I'm so confused about everything at the moment. I was diagnosed yesterday with high functioning autism. All of my children are adults and have been diagnosed later in life, late teens early 20's all high functioning autism.

Now I've helped them all where I can through diagnosis and afterwards. But I sat and thought when the assessment was done, who helps me? Where do I turn? How do I process this?

I knew how to help with my children, still do. I studied everything I possibly could. 

Obviously high functioning autism has to come from somewhere. But although over the past year I've thought I could be? I was relieved them guilty them upset one straight after the other. I had time on holiday last year talking to my brother about childhood and started to look at my own life.

I feel like I need to take time away on my own just to try to process it all.

How do I process it all? I'm waiting for the ADHD assessment in November.

Thank you so much if you've read all this. I needed to write it down xx

Parents

  • Thank you for posting this. I was about the same age when I got my diagnosis, it was a bit of a surprise to me to be honest, although people that knew me didn't seem shocked at all! It has taken me a couple of years to get my head around it. One thing I had to come to terms with was that I think I had quite a negative view of autism I think (which was mostly generational), but the obvious thing to remember is that you're the same person you were prior to the diagnosis. Now you just know why you like train timetables so much :) 

    Looking at other posts here and thinking about my own experience, a late diagnosis can sometimes feel like a mixed blessing. But one practical and useful thing about it was that it enabled me to find tools that helped me to operate better in a mostly neurotypical world. Just knowing that I had to manage my social battery, coming up with a list of things that tired me out and conversely charged me up was really useful. (You'll know all about these already by the sounds of things but remember to apply them to yourself).

    Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Give yourself time to get used to the idea. Remember how kind you were to your kids when they were diagnosed and extend the same grace to yourself. You will get through this and process it, but take it a day at a time. 

Reply

  • Thank you for posting this. I was about the same age when I got my diagnosis, it was a bit of a surprise to me to be honest, although people that knew me didn't seem shocked at all! It has taken me a couple of years to get my head around it. One thing I had to come to terms with was that I think I had quite a negative view of autism I think (which was mostly generational), but the obvious thing to remember is that you're the same person you were prior to the diagnosis. Now you just know why you like train timetables so much :) 

    Looking at other posts here and thinking about my own experience, a late diagnosis can sometimes feel like a mixed blessing. But one practical and useful thing about it was that it enabled me to find tools that helped me to operate better in a mostly neurotypical world. Just knowing that I had to manage my social battery, coming up with a list of things that tired me out and conversely charged me up was really useful. (You'll know all about these already by the sounds of things but remember to apply them to yourself).

    Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Give yourself time to get used to the idea. Remember how kind you were to your kids when they were diagnosed and extend the same grace to yourself. You will get through this and process it, but take it a day at a time. 

Children
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