Hi everyone,
My name is Nick, I am 30 years old, autistic and have been dealing with depression and social anxiety for most of my life. I have had my ups and downs, but have always managed to pull through, and done my best to understand what I need to do to get myself through life. Unfortunately, I am reaching the point in life now where I am getting tired of trying, as when it comes to friendships, relationships and career opportunities, despite my best efforts they have all ended in failure. Some have been from my own failings, especially when I was younger, but a vast majority have been from toxic relationships, being let down by those I thought closest to me, and career wise, world events that are out of my control (I am a digital artist and writer that was just starting my career in a world now obsessed with AI and jobs becoming a scarce commodity). So I currently have never had a friendship last longer than 2 years, never had a long term relationship and am frightened all the work I've put into developing my skills for my career have been for nothing.
Because of all this, for the last few years I have become very misanthropic, have severe trust issues, a great amount of self-hatred and just struggling to find the spark for life. I will always make the effort with others, but am regularly just disappointed with how self-centred most people are and can't find a connection with anyone. Which is why I am now here. I have recently taken up therapy with a specialist to try to help me deal with my issues, and they have suggested coming to speak with people who may have the same conditions and possibly same outlook on life.
So hello everyone, I'd love to speak to anyone who may feel similarly, or just want to talk. I hope I haven't scared anyone off, I still always do my best to pleasant to others, so all are welcome!
Thanks for reading, all the best to everyone!