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Whole life flashing before my eyes since diagnosis!

Emerald

I am experiencing a constant stream of memories from my whole life, several decades of it. So much misunderstanding, judgement and rejection, and now i know why i have always been 'weird' for other people. Any big stress and i would talk about myself too much. I have felt so much shame for doing this.  Contrasted with my 'normal' persona which was ultra polite, kind, helpful and 'such a good listener' and, i now see, not 'me' at all but an adaptation to try to belong, i guess others were confused and put off by me. 

Does anyone relate to this?

Parents

  • some days I go through many emotions in a day which feel like I am reliving large chunks of my life. Or at least the way I view this is that I am revisiting memories which are linked to feelings from a specific time. Dealing with emotions can be something which I avoid but if I am being creative and in a safe space letting them flood over me in a controlled way can be helpful/useful if I am managing that time. There is a fine line it would be very easy to become self indulgent or deep dive into areas to which prolonged exposure could lead to feeling morose or worse still some kind of dependency.

Reply

  • some days I go through many emotions in a day which feel like I am reliving large chunks of my life. Or at least the way I view this is that I am revisiting memories which are linked to feelings from a specific time. Dealing with emotions can be something which I avoid but if I am being creative and in a safe space letting them flood over me in a controlled way can be helpful/useful if I am managing that time. There is a fine line it would be very easy to become self indulgent or deep dive into areas to which prolonged exposure could lead to feeling morose or worse still some kind of dependency.

Children
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