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Hello! Daughter got diagnosed today

Nat1930

Hi 

just introducting myself here as I just found out my 10 years old daughter is Autistic but I had a feeling since she was a toddler that she was neurodiverse.

I was very upset this morning as I was hoping I was wrong… however I have changed my outlook - I can work on my relationship understanding my daughter more and help her to be positive individual. It is emotional dyregulation / social skills she struggles with. 

My question is that should I tell her now (she is doing okay/ happy / not realising she is different although she struggles to make friends esp girls - she got lot of friends (boys) or wait till she is struggling emotionally? I don’t want her to feel different ( I mean in a nice way) 

Any books recommendations I should look at ? 

Thanks 

from a new proud mum of autistic daughter 

Parents

  • My son just got diagnosed today too, he's 11. At our meeting he was there and they told him directly, and they were pretty good with how they approached the subject -talked about needing different people in the world and everyone is different, some people think differently and are better at some things than others. I highlighted some stuff he's really good at! They made sure he was okay and could ask questions (he didn't obviously), but he has a follow up appointment too which I thought was helpful -having structured points to talk about it might help in the future as a family thing I was thinking, a certain time he knows I'll ask (routine and structure are good). Plus we have a system were we have post it note conversations, I throw in lots of silly things to make it fun (like do you prefer burgers or pizza?) and we also ask deeper questions. Gives him a safe space to ask things if he wants to that can be difficult to say out loud, especially if your autistic. 

    I was diagnosed a couple of weeks ago, so I had a way of talking about it and normalising it too before hand. All this makes it sound like I know what I'm doing but I really don't!

    I am about to look at this book list and see what more I can do.

  • in reply to Cinnabar_wing

    pizzaburgers for me!!! all the best to your son :-)

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