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Hi from Scotland

Maisie

Hi I'm Maisie. I have been diagnosed with autism not that it was a big surprise as I've been almost sure I'm autistic for a while but even though I knew nothing would change after my diagnosis I find myself disappointed that I still struggle with interacting with others and being different.

A part of me really thought things would be different. I don't know why because I know that those things are core parts of autism. I think it was just wishful thinking on my part.

I've looked for groups in my area but there's only one relatively close though I would have to catch the train to get to it and I'm not sure I could bring myself to do that. Public transport causes me anxiety and sensory overload so I try to avoid it when I can. 

I don't really do social media but I am lonely and tired of my own company so I want to give this a try in the hopes that it will help.

Parents

  • Hello.

    I knew it would make no difference, I rushed to confirm it all. I'll admit I liked the attention, although I was paying for it. Then it was over. I had a report. But then life carried on. I felt a bit lost and confused and pleased and sad.

    It helped that things made sense, although I had imposter syndrome for a while. But now I look there are some real weaknesses that I was trying to cover.

    The biggest change is to stop pushing so hard. It has changed everything. It has also allowed me to start connecting with my emotions and dealing with other stuff. I can't come to terms with having lost most of the last 30 years and the mistakes I made through not understanding myself. I'm somewhat traumatized.

    Change comes from you. Which is why you feel so lost after being diagnosed. You have validation but no action plan.

    I thought I was ok, but I have arranged everything to hide the problems by having routines. I wanted to do more new stuff but I am finding it harder than I thought.

    Things will settle. Give it time.

Reply

  • Hello.

    I knew it would make no difference, I rushed to confirm it all. I'll admit I liked the attention, although I was paying for it. Then it was over. I had a report. But then life carried on. I felt a bit lost and confused and pleased and sad.

    It helped that things made sense, although I had imposter syndrome for a while. But now I look there are some real weaknesses that I was trying to cover.

    The biggest change is to stop pushing so hard. It has changed everything. It has also allowed me to start connecting with my emotions and dealing with other stuff. I can't come to terms with having lost most of the last 30 years and the mistakes I made through not understanding myself. I'm somewhat traumatized.

    Change comes from you. Which is why you feel so lost after being diagnosed. You have validation but no action plan.

    I thought I was ok, but I have arranged everything to hide the problems by having routines. I wanted to do more new stuff but I am finding it harder than I thought.

    Things will settle. Give it time.

Children
  • in reply to Stuart333
    Stuart333 said:
    I thought I was ok, but I have arranged everything to hide the problems by having routines. I wanted to do more new stuff but I am finding it harder than I thought.

    I'm sorry you are finding it difficult. Try to be kind to yourself and give yourself time to process everything and adjust. You've had years of masking and living without knowing you were autistic so it's not going to be quick.

    I find it so hard to be patient and kind to myself but my assessor said that it's key to processing and adapting to the changes that come with the diagnosis.

    Her words were to be kind and to give myself time and try not to focus on the past and what's been but to look forward and focus on what's to come. This isn't easy to do I know, but I like her words and it gives me some small hope that things are going to get better and improve.

    Sending you positive vibes. I really hope things start to feel better for you x.