About time I did this....hello!

Hi all

I have a 9 year old daughter with Aspergers, diagnosed 4 years ago, but until now, I have not taken advantage of any groups or help. Maybe i was in denial, i dont know, but we were coping.

This last 9 months has been hell! Since October 2013, my daughter has suddenly become very anxious about attending school and leaving me and is on the verge of being a school refuser. She has no real friends to speak of, she says school is getting harder and that her head is always full of worry and she cannot think of good things. She is in mainstream school and does not get any individual support. She also has taken a dislike to her teacher & teaching assistant as she says they shout and tell her off. She does struggle to understand tone of voice and facial expressions which does not help.

The school SENco has been great, but things have been very slow and nothing is going to be resolved before she goes in to year 5. Our GP put a referral in to CAMHS and they saw her last week,  but they cannot help her as she has an ASD diagnosis and apparently needs to see a paediatrician instead. We are also desperately trying to get an Educational Psychologists Assessment to see if she is in the right environment for her education or if she needs more specialised help. This is proving more tricky though and unlikely before the end of 2014.

Anyway, this is me, hoping to be able to communicate a little with people who understand.

Parents
  • Hi Gingernutty

    I am in a similar position to yourself with school refusal however my daughter is older and didn't get a diagnosis until Feb this year.

    I think part of your issue here is the teacher and TA.  They seem to have little understanding of ASD.  As far as EP is concerned, the school should have allocated time and it is up to them to decide if your daughter goes to the top of the list.  Maybe there are other children that need assessing first but school refusal should pop her to the top of the list.

    I've also been told recently that school refusal should trigger the school to request a CAF (ours didn't do that) so that you can access help.

    There are services available for school refusals but you often have to make noise to get it.  If you have a family information service in your area, give them a call and see what help you can get.  Often, senco's dont know everything that you are entitled too - I have certainly found that out since my daughter moved on from Primary and they were an amazing school.

    Lastly, I'd say, ask the school to accomodate her school refusal. Maybe ask if she can start later, finish earlier, have a special place to go at break times - there is so much the school can do to help her.  After my daughter had a little breakdown, I knew that my number one priority was to keep her safe and let her stay off school and now she's much calmer and is accessing help finally and making progress!

Reply
  • Hi Gingernutty

    I am in a similar position to yourself with school refusal however my daughter is older and didn't get a diagnosis until Feb this year.

    I think part of your issue here is the teacher and TA.  They seem to have little understanding of ASD.  As far as EP is concerned, the school should have allocated time and it is up to them to decide if your daughter goes to the top of the list.  Maybe there are other children that need assessing first but school refusal should pop her to the top of the list.

    I've also been told recently that school refusal should trigger the school to request a CAF (ours didn't do that) so that you can access help.

    There are services available for school refusals but you often have to make noise to get it.  If you have a family information service in your area, give them a call and see what help you can get.  Often, senco's dont know everything that you are entitled too - I have certainly found that out since my daughter moved on from Primary and they were an amazing school.

    Lastly, I'd say, ask the school to accomodate her school refusal. Maybe ask if she can start later, finish earlier, have a special place to go at break times - there is so much the school can do to help her.  After my daughter had a little breakdown, I knew that my number one priority was to keep her safe and let her stay off school and now she's much calmer and is accessing help finally and making progress!

Children
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