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Recently ASD diagnosed and wanting more of a social life!

Xine

Hello!

I have finally been diagnosed with autism, after years of struggling with my mental health. I finally feel like I can now get to know myself, and understand how and why I react the way I do! After 40 (odd!) years of being told I'm "weird", it's a huge relief!

My daughters have also been diagnosed, one of the many reasons why I wanted my own assessment!

The problem i have is that I'm very lonely. I want a social life, but cannot cope with the responsibilities that go with that! I'm just wandering how other people deal with this? As someone who has masked a lot in their life, to be able to be myself in social situations is terrifying. Especially around people who i have known for years. Any help or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. 

Parents

  • Oh, and welcome to the forum! (I forgot to write that earlier because I'm got great at remembering the social conventions in their conventional order. Wink)

    You will want to do things "now" and you will want to see results "now" and you will find that you are failing to do both of those things "now". When that inevitably happens, be kind to yourself. It is only to be expected. You're autistic (i.e., awesome), so of course you find these things hard. If you didn't, you wouldn't be autistic. So, be kind to yourself, forgive yourself when you don't "measure up", and take it slowly. And as @profdanger so wisely recommends:

    profdanger said:
    practice unmasking and conversing with us here on this forum

    We're all in the same boat here. None of us has much of a clue how to do any of this. But we pick up little tips or encouragement from each other and share our ups and downs, or just shoot the breeze or infodump without fear or judgement.

Reply

  • Oh, and welcome to the forum! (I forgot to write that earlier because I'm got great at remembering the social conventions in their conventional order. Wink)

    You will want to do things "now" and you will want to see results "now" and you will find that you are failing to do both of those things "now". When that inevitably happens, be kind to yourself. It is only to be expected. You're autistic (i.e., awesome), so of course you find these things hard. If you didn't, you wouldn't be autistic. So, be kind to yourself, forgive yourself when you don't "measure up", and take it slowly. And as @profdanger so wisely recommends:

    profdanger said:
    practice unmasking and conversing with us here on this forum

    We're all in the same boat here. None of us has much of a clue how to do any of this. But we pick up little tips or encouragement from each other and share our ups and downs, or just shoot the breeze or infodump without fear or judgement.

Children